JERSEY SHORE PHOTOCAP: Snooki Desperately Seeks Rock Bottom, Not There Yet

I haven’t posted about the Jersey Shore kids in a few weeks, but I can assure you that you’ve missed nothing. Sure, there was a car accident, and sure there were sapphic moments aplenty, but all in all, this season has been a little dull. I think it’s time to send this bunch of hooligans …

JERSEY SHORE PHOTOCAP: Ron Again, Off Again

Oh lucky us: we the TV viewers nabbed two episodes of Jersey Shore this week, and guess what? They all centered around the perpetual drama swirling around Ronnie and Sammi. For some reason I thought maybe, just maybe the two idiots wouldn’t knock boots again, but I should have known better / remembered the previews …

JERSEY SHORE PHOTOCAP: Twin-ter’s Bone

SPOILER ALERT: Ronnie and Sammi are back together! That’s right: reality TV’s most dysfunctional, unlikable, and messy couple has reunited for the umpteenth time, despite previous proclamations of proud singlehood and steadfast independence. I can’t say I was terribly surprised by these developments on Jersey Shore. After all, Sammi is too decimated in the self-esteem …

JERSEY SHORE PHOTOCAP: Florence and the Drinking Machines

Not much happened on the latest episode of Jersey Shore, and what did happen felt all too familiar. Deena fell over. Ronnie got wasted. Sammi realized she still loved Ronnie. Deena fell over again. Situation got a blowjob. Deena fell a third time. Ronnie fell. Sammi fell. And J-Woww made coffee in the most unconventional …

JERSEY SHORE PHOTOCAP: Trash TV, Italian Style

Our favorite gelled up, boob-inflated mooks from Seaside Heights returned late last week with the rousing season premiere of Jersey Shore. This time, the gang headed East to the motherland, Italy, for some back-to-roots boozing and bacchanalia. I wasn’t sure how the rather refined locale of Florence would work on this decidedly low-market show, but …

JERSEY SHORE PHOTOCAP: The Last Supper

To quote Snooki: WAAAH! Jersey Shore wrapped up its third season (or is it the second half of the second season?) on Thursday, and I can already feel a void in my life. A year ago, I would have said that sarcastically. Now I say it sincerely. I never thought I’d love this show as …

JERSEY SHORE PHOTOCAP: The Situation Caught That Bitch

It was a return to the Ron and Sam show on last night’s Jersey Shore. For three-quarters of the episode, everything was fine and dandy between the two idiots; although, clearly drama was on the horizon — and I’m not just saying that because I saw the previews. The two slowly began to fall into …

JERSEY SHORE PHOTOCAP: Thank Goodness MTV Doesn’t Broadcast in Smell-O-Vision

Oh snap! I just realized it’s Thursday, and I hadn’t done my Jersey Shore photocap from last week yet! I blame this squarely on the barista competition I judged which not only put me behind schedule, but also had me in a world of hurt last Thursday night. It’s like I blocked out any and …

JERSEY SHORE PHOTOCAP: The Calm Before The Storm?

This week’s episode of Jersey Shore was a fairly low-key event. There was no fighting, no significant cockblocking, no noteworthy smooshing, no drunken foolishness. Just our favorite over-tanned buddies hanging out and having a good time. As a result, the installment veered on the boring side, but I gotta admit that I enjoyed the laziness …

QUICK HIT: DJ Pauly D Strips Down For Ellen

For all those curious about DJ Pauly D’s tattoos, Ellen Degeneres goaded the Jersey Shore star into taking off his shirt and giving her a full tour of his ink. It’s a surprisingly affable clip (although, considering that both Pauly D and Ellen rank high on the affable-o-meter, I guess it’s not THAT surprising).