TV. Food. Pop Culture.
So apparently I may have just started a feud with supermodel Alessandra Ambrosio. Turns out she’s the owner of that green dog I posted about earlier. I still contend that Buddha is one of the stupidest-looking dogs I’ve ever seen in my life, even if he is/was owned by a supermodel. And let’s get one …
Continue reading “UPDATE: I Did Not Realize This Was Alessandra Ambrosio's Dog”
I just received an urgent, automated call here at home. Apparently one of my neighbors has a missing dog, and even worse, the owner suspects that he’s been stolen! That’s right, the inappropriately named Buddha has been plucked out of West Hollywood, disappearing into the ether like a fleeting, spectral vision. I have to admit …
Sure this video may be eight months old, but hey, I just found it courtesy of Best Week Ever, and man, am I glad that I did. Now I feel about ten times better about my life. All together now: nn-ts, nn-ts, nn-ts… (that’s me pretending to be the awful music coming out of the …
Feeling desperate? Suffer from blindness? Deafness? Lacking any senses in particular? Well, if you have a few extra bucks, this might be just what you need to spice up your life: a date with American Idol’s Constantine Maroulis, the living incarnation of baklava (and just as sticky!). It’s an opportunity too wonderful/smarmy to pass up! …
Living in West Hollywood, my neighborhood is routinely patrolled by parking enforcement officers, who quietly stalk their prey from the comfort of their white, eco-friendly Priuses — waiting for that orgasmic moment when they can slap a ticket down on a permit-lacking vehicle and tow it away. Their Orwellian presence rivals a godlike power to …
Continue reading “Obnoxious Teens Vs. Parking Enforcement: Who Will Win???”
Go around. Okay, this just happened outside my window, and thankfully, my camera was nearby; so I could document all the idiocy on display. I was up here in my room, typing away on my next Hills recap when suddenly, I heard the blaring sound of a car horn. Now, I don’t mind car horns …
Continue reading “IDIOT ANGELENO OF THE DAY: Lexus Driver Edition”
Oh The Real World. The once proud reality series has stumbled in recent seasons (I stopped watching midway through Denver), but despite flagging quality, the show is gearing up for its twentieth season (!!). To celebrate this impressive feat, MTV threw a special awards show for The Real World, and honestly, what better way to …
Continue reading “Real World Awards Provide New Opportunities to Mock Old Friends”
It’s been a while since I’ve written up one of my gym horror stories, but sadly, I think that’s more a sign of my lackadaisical workout routine than it is of improved hygienic awareness. People are still disgusting, and never was that more evident than today when I headed to the gym and encountered a …
Continue reading “GYM HORRORS: So Bad, I Had To Inform The Staff”
I’m so fired up with political activism right now I’m surprised there’s no annoying Facebook group dedicated to me. Last night, I attended my very first Planning Commission meeting here in West Hollywood, and while I knew I’d encounter several stodgy old people and myopic idiots, I didn’t realize the degree to which they’d a) …
Continue reading “West Hollywood Planning Commission Convenes, Idiots Flock”
(Dramatization) Another day, another gross story from the gym. Thankfully, this tale details significantly fewer threats to my personal health and hygiene as my last gym horror story, but I still find it quite appalling. I guess by now it’s probably not hard to imagine what’s so offensive this time around, what with my headline …
Continue reading “GYM HORRORS: Sweaty Idiots Overrun Peaceful Workout”