When my friend Dan sent me a spartan email featuring the line “This is all you” followed by a solitary link, I had to admit: I was intrigued. Maybe I should have looked at his email subject, “Bless her heart,” because that would have tipped me off to the amazing tidbit that followed. You see, Dan had sent me a link about Gail Simmons and the nutritional woes she faced while hosting her new show, Top Chef: Just Desserts.. The headline alone had me chuckling:

“Gail Simmons’s All-Butter, All-Sugar Top Chef Diet”

Yes, it was almost as if my Padma/Gail parody dynamic had come to life. Perhaps this was truly life imitating art. To boot:

Simmons — who hosted a book party for the paperback release of Frank Bruni’s Born Round at Dumbo’s Powerhouse Arena on Wednesday — sought advice from the pro, Padma Lakshmi [about tasting all the food]. “Padma always was like, ‘Just pace yourself, Gail. I know you eat a lot, but this is [different].'”

I die. What more can I add to that?

To read the full item, click here.

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