Well, football season officially closed out last night with a fantastic Super Bowl, courtesy of the Indianapolis Colts and the new world champions New Orleans Saints. It was an overall exciting game, albeit perhaps a little low-scoring given the numbers the two powerhouse quarterbacks usually put up. Nevertheless, one can't complain about an epic showdown by two perfectly matched teams who went nearly the entire regular season with undefeated records.

Okay, I take that back. One can complain, and quite vociferously, I might add. Not about the game itself, mind you, but instead the various musical acts surrounding it. And the commercials too (although, they also deserve some praise).

I suppose it all begins with Steve Winwood, an aging rock star whose hits ("The Finer Things," "Valerie") I've quietly championed for some time. I won't lie: I thought he was the best thing ever in 1988, and quite honestly, he'd done little in the past twenty-two years to sway my opinion on that front. Well, unfortunately, that nifty preconception was completely destroyed yesterday when the guy appeared on a Super Bowl pre-show to sing my favorite of his songs, "Higher Love." And by "sing," I mean "butcher," because that's exactly what Steve Winwood did to this beloved song, nay, ANTHEM of my life. His voice, as expected, was not nearly as strong as it used to be, but that wasn't truly the problem. As gravelly as Señor Winwood had become, he still could hit most of his notes (unlike his comrades in The Who). The real tragedy was that he opted to mix up the tune's musical arrangement, giving it a jazzy Latin flair that did little but make the entire experience feel like some ill-conceived lobby act in a suburban Wichita Holiday Inn. Trust me, I did try to fend off all my snarky rebukes of the performance, lest I face the brutal reality that Steve Winwood is now over the hill, but as I watched him growling at his piano, floppy curls blowing this way and that, I just had to admit that the GOW (Glory of Winwood) had passed. It didn't help matters that every backing musician around him looked like they were on break from their real job working as a server at some West Palm Beach retirement community. Meanwhile, the crowd was hardly having any of this disaster. I think I've seen more emotion from the rocks at Stonehenge. It was total, horrific sadness.

Up and coming singer Steph Jones posted this amusing video of himself plucking coils of his hair from his head and placing them in a cup. This is followed by shirtless crying and quiet sadness. Nevertheless, he's trying to get the views on YouTube up, and if it reaches 8,000 plays, he's going to auction off the aforementioned hair collection (a.k.a. the titular "Cup-O-Naps") to one very lucky person.

At this point, you might be asking yourself why I've highlighted this video, but here's the thing. I empathize with Steph and his humble pursuits. After all, I too know what it's like to try to get an online campaign off the ground (note my shameless plea for Twitter followers), and thus I'm paying it forward. So have a look and enjoy. Maybe someday you can be the very special owner of Steph Jones's hair.

Good luck, Steph!

Apropos of nothing, it's time for some self-congratulatory action here on B-Side Blog. I decided to check out some of my Google stats last night and discovered some very interesting information. For example, I've crowed for a while about the fact that this site is often the number one search result for the term "Big Brother Sex" (no easy feat with over 35.5 million results), but did you know that it's also number one for "DC housewives" and more importantly "24 is awesome"? The truth is it's quite surprising how high in the rankings good ol' B-Side Blog lands (PAY ATTENTION, ADVERTISERS).

More amusing discoveries after the jump...

The Wanderkind: The Culture of Comp
LA Now: Aerialist who fell at Beverly Center broke numerous bones, spent 7 weeks in wheelchair
New York Times: For Hollywood, Stand-Ins Play California’s Part (thanks Neil!)
Socialite Life: Answers To Taylor Swift's Out Of Tune Grammy Performance
Vulture: Clarkson Blasts Swift’s Label Prez
ESPN: LaDainian Tomlinson thinks his time with San Diego Chargers is done :(
Katherine Spiers: Lost Bento Recap and Finale Bento — Adventures in Bentomaking: Bento Lunches by Pikko
Company Town: Sen. Al Franken comes out swinging against Comcast-NBC deal
KTLA: Boy Chokes to Death in Hot Dog Eating Contest for Haiti

Score another one for NBC, which seems to find itself in a new PR quagmire every time I turn on the computer. Last week, it was Chris Matthews saying he forgot Obama was black, and the week -- or rather weeks -- before that it was Conan-gate (or is it Leno-gate?). Well, today comes another egregious misstep by the Peacock: a lunch special at the 30 Rock commissary which offered up fried chicken, collard greens, and black eyed peas in honor of Black History Month. I'm shocked there was no watermelon or grape soda on display too.

Questlove from The Roots snapped a picture of this ridiculousness, and soon after it hit Twitter, the sign miraculously disappeared. Since then, there have been statements from NBC and the revelation that the commissary is not in fact part of the Peacock empire. Scandal!

Found via The Wrap.

Last night's episode of Modern Family wasn't out of this world, but I greatly appreciated the writers' insistence on making Sofia Vergara say "cupcake" as often as possible.

After the jump, my favorite line of the night.

If the previews are any indication, we are in store for quite the episode of The Real Housewives of Orange County tonight. Not only do we see Lynne get evicted, but there are going to be fights galore during one ill-fated dinner party. And guess what? Vicki's at the center of them all! This is what we call a good time. Above, check out an über-awkward interaction between Vicki, Simon, and Tamra. The longer you watch it, the worse it gets. It's sort of a despicable video -- if only because any footage that makes me feel bad for Tamra is one that I detest.

After the jump is a strange clip featuring Tamra and Simon going on a motorcycle jaunt. It ends with Tamra about to reveal what sounds like a scandalous secret, but I'm sure we'll find out her shady revelation is that she bought Simon a watch or something. Whatever it is, I'm prepared to be let down.

Via CryingWife.com

Consumerist: Spirit Airlines Releases Another Naughty Sounding Promo (thanks IndianJones)
AP: `Avatar' tops $600M, beats `Titanic' domestic haul
Great White Snark: Tastes Like Plutonium: Awesome Back to the Future DeLorean Cake
LAist: Eye Nosh: What's Up Doc? Carrot Cake Day!
D-Listed: BOO: There's No Cheating In The New Monopoly
LA Now: Baby gray whale 'putting on quite a show' off Malibu Pier
Credo Action: CBS: Don't air anti-abortion Super Bowl ad
ESPN: Burress: 'I will play again'
The Telegraph: Lesbian albatrosses to raise chick

Still trying to figure out what to make for Super Bowl Sunday? Perhaps you should take the lead of my friend Heather, author of Eat Your Feelings, who has made this instructional video in the effort to a) enlighten the masses on a possible game-time option, and b) promote her aforementioned book.

Anyway, take a gander at the video, and please enjoy Heather shot-gunning a beer.

Via Vulture

This Super Bowl spot for the upcoming video game Dante's Inferno was rejected by CBS, presumably for the clever tag line "Go To Hell." It's a bit ridiculous that something like this can be jettisoned to the side while Tim Tebow can take the airwaves and push a message by the religious right down our throats. Nevertheless, all controversy aside, the trailer for this game looks pretty cool -- at least from an artistic perspective. It's a hell of a lot more engaging than another round of dancing lizards (which I'm sure we'll see Sunday night).

One of my cardinal flaws is that I don't watch Lost. I've seen some episodes, but it just really never spoke to me. It's not that I'm opposed to the show -- maybe down the line I'll someday rent it all and catch up with pop culture -- but for now, I'm happily Dharma free. That being said, when my friend Jen posted pictures of her Lost premiere party from last night, even I could appreciate the effort involved.

After the jump, some photos of Jen's creativity, including a very impressive smoke monster.

I think it's time for a new Twitter goal. Last year, I made a fuss about wanting to reach 1,000 followers (with at least one being a noteworthy celebrity), and happily I succeeded on both fronts (thank you, Blair Underwood). Now I'm at it again. I'm restless for more followers, and no, it's not because I have some deep-seated desire to be popular (although I do have that). It's because more Twitter followers means more traffic for this site. And more traffic for this site means higher ad revenue. And higher ad revenue means greater happiness for me. And greater happiness for me, means better blog quality for you (theoretically). So really, it's a win-win situation.

My new goal is to hit 2,000 followers (ideally 2,500). Another celebrity would be fun, but it's not essential. So if you're not following me, sign up! After all, The Wrap did include me on its list of "50 TV Insiders to Follow Right Now." If that's not an endorsement, I don't know what is. Besides, if you follow me, you'll be privy to such glorious things as celebrity sighting tweets, impromptu TV observations, and biting social commentary. And by that, I mean whiney posts about being hungry (ie "I am very hungry. And drunk. The two are perhaps related." 1:53 AM Jan 30th).

So follow me on Twitter at twitter.com/bsideblog. And then tell all your friends. It's the American thing to do.

Thanks!

Everyone should watch Cougar Town tonight. Why? Well, aside from the fact that the show has been steadily improving on the funny front, tonight's episode has been written by occasional B-Side Blog personality (not to mention my close friend) sawgee. Even more importantly, this is the first episode of anything he's written to air on network TV; so it's kind of a big deal for him career-wise. Let's help him out and get him the best ratings possible. Tune in at 9:30 PM tonight on ABC.

For a preview of tonight episode, check out the show's website here. I would have embedded the video, but the geniuses at ABC.com don't provide code for that. I mean, because who would ever want a promo video to be accessed as easily as possible? Sorry. I'm bitter on account of not having had breakfast yet. Will eat shortly.

In conclusion, watch Cougar Town tonight and then write ABC a letter about how much you enjoyed the episode.

New York Times: ‘Avatar’ and ‘Hurt Locker’ Lead Oscar Field
ESPN: A note to all managers: Shhhh (thanks IndianJones)
Shine: Vanity Fair's "New Hollywood" issue completely lacks diversity
Sinosoul: How to Survive Pizzas from Mozza2Go
Vulture: Bullock Won’t Snub the Razzies
LA Times: Jumbo squid ink-jet their way to Newport Beach
Food2: 1st Annual Cupcake Cup Challenge Is Now Open
IvyGate: Padma Lakshmi’s Baby Daddy is a Columbia Professor
Socialite Life: Simon Cowell's 'Everybody Hurt's' Haiti Song Debuts
Movieline: BREAKING: Conan-Leno Mudslinging Continues With Oprah.com Poll Allegations
Caroline on Crack: Delphine at W Hollywood: You’re Beautiful but M’Eh

At long last, Kelly Cutrone's new Bravo series Kell On Earth premiered last night, and it was pretty much everything I could have wanted. The entire episode was one big tea kettle of stress, slowly bubbling away over the course of sixty minutes until finally the pressure was too great, leading Kelly to flip her shit in one of her most seething blow-ups I'd ever seen (if you're still following the metaphor, that was the moment that the teapot began to whistle). Even better, I got the distinct impression that this explosion was just a little nothing on the Kelly scale. Oh, I can only imagine what treats will be in store for us over the course of the season.