HILLS FINALE: No Crabs for Audrina

“I should have made scallops…” Ladies and gentlemen, The Hills season three has come to an end. For reals this time. No more of this “continuation” crap. Yes, it is done and over, and now we have to wait three long months for August when season four pops up on MTV. Judging by the sneak …

Hills Spoof of the Day

These days, Hills spoofs are a dime a dozen, but this one is actually pretty good. It’s not perfect, but the UCLA kids that put this together definitely picked up on many subtle Hills-isms. If only they had included some sort of Lisa Love character… Thanks to Jose for forwarding this to me.

LO AND BEHOLD: Three's A Crowd

Hello everyone. After a two week hiatus, I’m back to writing Hills recaps. I sincerely tried to write them in Europe, but it was simply too hard to be snarky when there was so much bewildering television on. I apologize for the lack of content, but rest assured I am back and ready to dig …

How Long Is Relationship Vacation?

I have to admit something. My Hills universe is getting all sorts of murky. It used to be that everyone hated Heidi, except Spencer, Stephanie, and the occasional sidekick (a.k.a. Bolthouse lackey #457). Now everything’s getting all jumbled around. Audrina seems to be dangerously returning to the Heidisphere, Spencer seems to be curiously leaving it, …

GOSSIP GIRL? Stephanie Pratt Attempts To Be The Universal Sidekick

The second half of The Hills season is only a few episodes old, but already She-Spencer, née Stephanie Pratt, has already turned out to be a breakout star. The first instinct is to hate her as she is a descendent of the Pratt lineage, but her naughty manipulations and Iago-esque troublemaking have made her the …