We’ve had “The Last Supper.” We’ve had “The Dinner Party from Hell.” And now Bravo has introduced us to GAME NIGHT, which wasn’t nearly as full of the merriment and whimsey as the name implies. Don’t get me wrong — it was crazy fun for the us, the audience. I’m not so sure the same could be said of the participants in this utter disaster. Yes, it was another soiree gone awry on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, and once again I’m left loving this trainwreck combination of women.

The craziness all went down at Dana’s house, which was about as empty and soulless as one might expect. As usual, she greeted her guests with exclamations of brand names and designers before settling into her normal groove of using the word “Awesome!” five times in one sentence. Dana was on fire this episode — in the most deplorable way. When she wasn’t bragging, she was sticking her nose up all the women’s asses, except Brandi who is clearly on the low end of the totem pole. Dana couldn’t give a shit about Brandi, as evidenced later on in the episode when she barked angrily at her for calling her Pam (when Kim was literally given a free pass under the guise of it being “their thing”).

Dana, you see, is a classic Hollywood social climber. One only needs to look at the way she aggressively declared Kim and Kyle Richards her friends. First she told Kim that she loved her (and her soul). Then she repeatedly used the phrase descriptor “MY FRIEND KYLE” a half-dozen times — just in case there was any confusion. She seems to think that the more she states these things, the more true they become.

The real story, however, was the clash between the Richards and Brandi. Kyle has disliked Brandi right from the get go, and tonight the simmering tension finally bubbled over. We can thank an intense round of Celebrity for that. First off, Kim not-so-quietly muttered that she didn’t want to be on Brandi’s team. Many times. It was rude, to say the least. I wouldn’t normally expect Kim to be so brash, but then again, who knows what the Happy Pills were doing to her. Yes, Kim was in her standard disheveled state, requiring several trips to the bathroom for upkeep (during which Kyle admonished her for carrying liquid liner — a random high point of the episode).

Anyway, Kim was a rambling mess, and when she busted out her catty comments, Kyle merely laughed and giggled in classic Mean Girl fashion. I’m not going to lie: I was definitely on Team Brandi for this one.

The cattiness escalated once the game got underway as Kim and Kyle began feeding each other clues that only they could guess. This caused Brandi to feel left out — or MORE left out — and very quietly, we could see the snake begin to coil into attack mode. Danger appeared to be imminent.

Sure enough, Brandi let out a sniveling comment or two about being left out, but that only served to heighten the tension, not solve the inequities of the Celebrity dynamic. It was only inevitable that one of the Richards sisters would make a grand, passive-aggressive gesture. Cue Kyle. She stood before the room and declared that it was time for the IQ test, BRANDI FIRST.

Brandi took immediate offense to this and rightfully so. She responded with a not-very-ladylike “Bring it, bitch!” which then put Kyle in attack mode. It was all so classically Mean Girls. Here Kyle and Kim had been baiting Brandi all night, and the moment Brandi finally fights back, they acted like innocent does. After all, everything they had been saying were merely jokes, right? Brandi should loosen up, right? Hmmm….

Well, at this point, everything went downhill. The Richards sisters began wagging and pointing their fingers, with Kim uttering my new favorite attack of all time, “YOU’RE A GODDAMN BITCH!” Sure, it’s simple, but coming out of Kim’s boozy mouth, it’s nothing short of perfection.

Brandi shockingly didn’t raise her voice (yet — we’ll see about next week). She just sat there calmly and spoke cold, sarcastic, and passive-aggressive words. This seemed to rile the sisters up more, who appeared like a two-headed serpent attacking its prey. Dana, meanwhile, took this opportunity to prove her worth as a sidekick and show loyalty to her new Masters. She repeatedly whipped out the phrase “MY FRIEND KYLE” again and clutched Taylor in faux fear. You’d think as the hostess, she’d squash this (much as poor Camille had tried to before leaving the room), but Dana just sat there and let it all unfurl. We won’t know until next week how this all ends, but it appears as though Taylor will be resurrecting her classic “Enough! ENOUGH!” line from last season.

Meanwhile, neighbors and generally classy ladies Adrienne and Lisa missed all the idiocy. Lisa was busy hosting a dinner party (did anyone else love that she cooked and served the food?) where she learned that Pandora was finally engaged. Adrienne, meanwhile, was simply MIA. Funny how she always manages to skip out of the disaster nights…

“Darling, you don’t think I’ll be missing anything terribly fun at game night, will I?”
“No. Just the girls being catty probably.”

Taylor: “I think this recipe calls for four tablespoons of butter, one cup of granulated sugar, and three cups of SADNESS, packed.”

“Check out my apron. It’s AWESOME.”
“Oh, where did you–“

“Wow, I just love all the cool devices in this kitchen. I don’t even know how to USE any of them. Like, what’s that thing?”
“It’s a microwave.”
“AWESOME. And that?”
“A cutting board.”
“AWESOME. I have a Valentino cutting board. I don’t even know how to use it!! And what’s that?”
“It’s a spoon.”
“I love it. AWESOME!”

“My face is frozen.”

“Yup. Still frozen.”

“Great. You bought me milk shakes. Is that what you do for all the women you think are SLUTS?”

[clomp clomp clomp]


[clomp clomp clomp]

“This staircase is AWESOME”

[clomp clomp clomp]

“It just takes a while in my Fendi.”

[clomp clomp clomp]

“Okay, a quarter of the way there!”

[clomp clomp clomp]

Kyle: “Huh. I thought this was game night, not Watch-The-Slut-In-The-Chair Night.”
“I’m right here.”

Kyle: “Hey Dana, thanks so much for inviting us into your cold, uninviting house!”

Dana: “Kim is here! That’s AWESOME! Oh, and Kim, there’s your sister and MY FRIEND Kyle!”

Kim: “I’m sorry I’m late. The power went out, and I… I’ve been having anxiety, and… I just… I don’t have any kids with me, and I just hate it when, like, there’s a pineapple, but then the chipmunks in the trees are just… they don’t know. They don’t KNOW. I love the planes at Van Nuys airport… I was a star.”

“Kim, I don’t care if you’re having anxiety or if you haven’t eaten in seven days: NEVER WEAR LIQUID LINER.”

“Hi, I’m Brandi.”
“Oh, I thought your name was Slut-On-Crutches.”
“I’m right here.”

Kim: “I… I don’t like Brandi. She’s wearing shorts, but not cool shorts like Pam–“
“No, I call her Pam. It’s, like, our thing now. Like, I say Pam, and she’s cool with it because we have this bond now, or, well, SHE said we had a bond, and that makes me think that we do because, well, I trust Pam, but her mirrors are dirty, which makes me think that maybe I shouldn’t trust her. I… I get nervous.”
“You’ve been sniffing liquid liner again, haven’t you?”

Dana: “I think we can agree that tonight has already been AWESOME, yes?”
Kim: “You are the best Pam! I mean, Dana!”
“Kim, you can call me whatever you like!”
Brandi: “That’s nice of you, Pam.”

Dana: “You guys, I have to tell an AWESOME story about MY FRIEND KYLE RICHARDS.”
Camille: “Yeah, we’re all friends with her.”
“Hahaha, that’s awesome. So anyway, MY FRIEND KYLE RICHARDS was like ‘What are you wearing?’ and I was all ‘Valentino and Fendi!’ Isn’t that AWESOME?”
Camille: “I really should have invited Alison DuBois to this.”

“I just want to play Monopoly.”

“HULLO. Here’s something I just whipped up. Oh, apologies, it’s all for Giggy.”

Kim: “Haha that Brandi is such a slut.”
Kyle: “Oh Kim, you CRACK me up!”
Camille: “Okay, you can get off me now.”


“This kind of makes me miss Eddie Cibrian.”

Taylor: “FOOOOOD!!!”

Kyle: “SLUT!”
Kim: “You’re a slut! And a GODDAMN BITCH!”
Kyle: “And you don’t get to call Dana ‘Pam.’ Only my sister gets to do that. I don’t know why, but she does.”

What did you think about this episode? Are you Team Richards or Team Brandi? And further thoughts on Dana?


  1. that dana-pam woman is awful. the bragging, the ill fitting clothing on that dumpy figure (sorry to body snark)…was she the chubby loud girl in high school who the cool mean girls kept around since she’d flatter them and go out of her way to say really mean stuff to less popular kids? way to grow out of that stage, lady. what’s up with housewives and sparsely furnished homes? do they blow their cash on the houses in advance of trying to look rich on tv but then realize they don’t have the budget for furnish them? whatever. shame on bravo for making me like camille, dba lizard lips, grammar. talk about ass-backwards day. and those terrible sisters picking on that slightly less terrible woman brandeeee. what the HELL. i love the drunk/loaded aunts of notorious valtrex user paris hilton berating another woman for her loose ways and booty shorts. classic richards move, i’m sure. almost as classic as using your worn out, irrelevant 1980s brush with fame as clues in celebrity. also, does anyone think that ms. lisa vanderpump, usually faultless in my eyes, is a little too mean to ken (shutting down his speech at dinner…he’s the pandora’s dad). finally, can we talk about pandora’s fiance? aside from having a penchant for attention getting dinner speeches, the soon to be mr. pandora is pretty easy on the eyes!

  2. Thank god you’re back! I was having withdrawals while you were in NY.

    I am also on Team Brandi for this episode. It seems that ever since Kyle has gotten more friendly with Taylor, the more ‘mean girl’ she has become. And, don’t even get me started on KIm. As Kathi W. says: “Cuckoo. Cuckoo!”

    I loved that the event planner Dana didn’t display any of the food (I guess we can call it that even though there were only cookies and a few breadsticks). I hope that she isn’t in too many more episodes, as I really don’t like her, and the more she is on, and drops brand names every chance she gets, just makes me want her gone.

  3. Team Brandi. The rest are awful. It appears Paul was correct in his opinion that women do not like it when new women enter into the mix—especially if they are good looking. Brandi is gorgeous and Kyle does not want to be replaced as the “pretty” one of the group. Too late. Behavior like Kyle’s makes you ugly real quick.

    1. Karen, I totally agree. this weeks episode was just plain mean. Shame on Adrienne for abandoning Brandi to these bitches. Kyle is really, really jealous of Brandi. How pathetic can kyle be. And what’s with her running after her sister all night making sure she didn’t get too loaded. Kyle is protecting her sister to keep her on the show so that mario doesn’t have to support her anymore. Makes me really hate kyle. she’ll go to any lengths to protect her sister for a paycheck. Adrienne needs to show some personality and start spending time with the women, or get off the show. It cracked me up when she told Brandi that the girls are mean to her too, but she doesn’t worry about the small stuff. B.S. Adrienne. You have MONEY/FAME on your side like Kyle does on hers so it is not an equal playing field. Brandi needs Adrienne to come to her defense.

      Can’t stand Dana. Like Havarti said, she is dumpy and doesn’t know how to dress or act. She did have her nose up kyle’s ass cuz she’s been told that’s where ur nose needs to be to get on the show. I think dana just rented a mansion for the season and tossed in a couple of couches. Taylor is a weak-ass twig with no backbone or personality.

      Boy, Camille sure has changed her tune. She’s cowing down to kyle too. Just pathetic. Kyle has become the “jill” of BH.

    2. Exactly right. Kyle didn’t like her the moment she saw her because she’s younger and hotter than her and just as tough.

      Team Brandi. I left Team Kyle at last year’s reunion while she and Taylor gave each other those long looks about Kim.

  4. When are you going to add a photocap of the last two episodes of The Real Housewives of New Jersey?

  5. That episode was only one Peter Dinklage short of Game of Thrones Beverly Hills.
    I am fully with the House of Brandi for this event. Kim’s calling her out for wearing shorts was hilarious. And after what Brandi has been through with Eddie/Leanne she can take a punch and not even flinch. Kim is clearly medicated no matter how many times Kyle tells us “she’s always been like that”.

    Dana’s lack of furniture was almost as bad as the actual furniture she has. Spend a little less on those outfits and sunglasses and a little more on some decent furnishings. As for the ugly food – what the hell.? Top Chef just desserts has better shit than that.

    I love that Lisa rolled up her sleeves, pinned up her hair and made the food herself. And that potato salad looked delicious. It was so sweet when she cried at the announcement of Pandora’s engagement. Plus it is always good to see Martin is still around.


    1. (Oh, PLEASE, gods of Bravo programming and casting, hear my prayer: DO add Peter Dinklage to this cast–NOBODY rolls the eye better than he, and what a great shot it would be: he manuevering between and among that stalking, thrusting, jutting-hipped FOREST of legs! This I pray. Amen.)

      1. Let’s cast these chicks:

        Kim is The Hound
        Kyle is Littlefinger
        Taylor is Sansa
        Dana/Pam is one of the Spider’s little birds
        Lisa is…
        Camille is…
        Adrienne is…

  6. I don’t like Brandi, but she really got shit on at game night.
    Wtf with Kim hiding her crutches? Kim may not have been drinking but she was on something. I laughed when she said the bathroom mirror was dirty, and flashed back to last week when SHE was cleaning and her cleaning lady just stood there, trapped.
    Dana is just awful. All the designer name dropping! How funny when she said that Valentino was just there, and Brandi asked if he was there.
    Can’t wait for next week.

  7. Kim, what is up with Kim? How many times to fix her makeup? good thing that Kyle the self proclaimed “makeup pro” was there to help the picture of K&K pointing their fingers and yelling, I can picture them at 7 yrs old doing that same thing looks to be maybe a rumble is in order

    These housewife shows should have a boxing ring and huge over sized boxing gloves, at the end of each show, the two angriest housewives duke it out and maybe during the reunions too ya know just to mix it up!

    1. Robbie, you just made me pee my pants a little! I couldn’t put my finger on who she reminded me of & you nailed it!

  8. I started laughing as soon as your page downloaded. Your blog makes me happy.

    As for the housewives, the whole episode was bizarre. Bravo must be meddling. Surely no one really behaves like that, right? WTF bitches? Seeing Kyle behave like such a meanie, almost makes me wonder what was really going down between her and Camille last season. Was she jealous of Camille like she is of Brandi? When we saw Camille acting like a bitch last year, was she just responding to the way she was being treated by Kyle? Bravo, you dirty spin-master!

  9. The Taylor and Dana apron bit was so fake, but I do love Dana… who knew it was hard to walk in Fendi…how would I know these things without Dana, please Bravo do not shut her up!
    I truly believe both Dana and Taylor live in fake houses or they did while they were playing Housewives of BH.
    Brandi was calling Dana Pam to rip on Kim.. what do you call that..passive aggressive?
    Kim needs hormones. I think she is ditzy and depressed so her brain is scattered she needs help. I hope she gets it.
    I think this season is going to be great!

  10. I can’t stand Kyle, she is clearly playing for camera time. Trying to be the next Bethenny (horror show) Frankel. I can’t stand this whole mean girl thing..it’s just bad. It’s disgraceful that the Richards family allows Kim to be exploited on television. She is a mess.

    Love, love, love Lisa. I was a little teary myself. And can anyone tell me, was she sitting on a throne at dinner? I hope so.

  11. This is turning out to be an excellent season. Kim is getting tweakier by the second, and Brandi describing Winston Churchill as a ‘famous black man’? HAHAHAHAHA. Also, what’s up with Taylor’s face? It seems to get worse every week. She looks like a stroke victim before rehab.

  12. Kyle irritated me last season, but this season she is just awful. I like how a woman who has had a bikini wax on tv is making fun of Brandi for wearing short shorts.

    Kim, I don’t really blame because she’s clearly not lucid and I think she’s just revelling in the positive attention from her sister. But the way Kyle was treating Brandi was gross.

    And Dana is just a mess. The bragging about how much things cost, the label name dropping, inviting herself to Camille’s house in Hawaii like 8 times, and kissing Kyle’s and Kim’s asses – it’s all so pathetic. She’s trying wayyyyyy too hard.

    I was expecting to hate Brandi but I just feel sorry for her.

    Great episode!

    1. Yeah, last season’s Camillie would have made some catty comment when Dana kept inviting herself to her house in Hawaii – like, “if you can afford $25,000 sunglasses, you can afford your own hotel room in Hawaiil”

  13. Just happy this was up! It was funny though. We all are on the same page. That was horrible.

  14. Kim- a hot mess
    Kyle – Bitch troll
    Camille – eh…..what ever
    Brandi- i actually felt bad for her this time
    Dana- what EVER … the Shreck commment summed that up perfectly
    Taylor- eat somthing , you look like SHIT
    Adreian- what ever…………
    Lisa- nice comment about loving your new son in law better then your son- hows that foot taste ?
    **look forward to this everyweek * thanks

  15. I’m a drug counselor. When Kim was telling Kyle she couldn’t sleep, eat, feels cold, blah blah blah..cant remember things… she was explaining a classic meth binge.

    She is ABOSLUTELY high and has been on every episode this season.

    Kyle was a total bitch. What’ her claim to fame? Being an aunt to a girl that was a trainwreck and paparazzi gold?

    I cheered when Brandi said “Bring it bitch”….. Kyle was a total bitch. If you read her Bravo blog she is back pedaling big time now…oh poor Kyle..

    1. That is good info, I was trying to figure out what she was on. It’s nothing like I’ve ever seen before.

      Wasn’t it a sex tape that made Paris “famous”?

    2. I’m with LynnB. I’ve I had a friend hide a meth addiction to me- exact same behavior and excuses.

  16. Did anyone else notice that Taylor’s left eye was totally messed up when she had Dana over and they were baking cookies? She had her hair in front of it, but it appeared she was trying to hide a black eye.

    1. i noticed that as well. i also thought the preview had camille saying “we don’t talk about how he hits you” but then that wasn’t in the episode?

  17. I guess I’m the lone wolf here. I find Lisa smug and grating. The way she shut Ken up when he tried to make a toast was just mean.

    But her worst sin was those huge Good Housekeeping style appetizers she brought out plated in the fruit peel (avocado? papaya?) with red garnish on top. She dresses and applies make-up like it’s 1980, and cooks like it’s 1950. I wonder if her entrees were served on a bed of lettuce and garnished with maraschino cherries, mandarin oranges, and mini marshmallows.

    1. I got the impression that Lisa didn’t want a speech from Ken because she was already crying and would keep crying if he made that speech. Or, she’s just a bitch lol.

      Those appetizers looked horrible. What the heck was that stuff on top?

  18. Someone should give Kim an Emmy. Maybe she is highly capable actress trying to get cast on an after school special.

    1. I think she may have thought she was in an episode of Dynasty and that Brandi was Heather Locklear.

  19. Personally, I’m really liking Brandi. Who knows, maybe it’s more feeling sorry for her with the way they’re treating her. I can’t believe Andrienne abandoned her at that game night. By the way Kyle kept close tabs on kim, she KNOWS her sister’s on drugs, but she’s going to jump Brandi’s shit when Brandi actually articulates it. She never let kim out of her sight because she knew she was going to do something in the bathroom, and it wasn’t take a leak.

  20. Kyle was the instigator for all of the ugliness displayed at game night. I don’t really blame Kim because she was so out of it, she probably didn’t even know what she was saying. Dana is absolutely one of the most annoying, obnoxious people ever to be on any Real Housewives series. The way she talks, the labels she mentions constantly….awful, awful, awful. I am totally on Team Brandi. One can tell that she is intimidating by the Housewives and is nervous around them especially with her only ally, Adrienne not present. Brandi had every right to defend herself. I like her spunk and the way she didn’t back down to “MY BEST FRIEND KYLE” Dana/Pam..ugh.. GO BRANDI!!

  21. All the women know Kim has a drug problem just like all knew Taylor was getting abused and didn’t say anything. The level of denial in this group is difficult to watch.

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