THE CITY PHOTOCAP: Tossed Aside

Major dramz on The City! Whitney and Roxy got into a huge fight, and now it looks like the roomies will be going their separate ways! It all started when Roxy was tasked with making sure a Canadian popstar named LIGHTS would wear a piece from the Whitney Eve line during a concert. I had my doubts about this LIGHTS character, but Kelly claimed she’d be the next big thing, and the last time Kelly did that, she was talking about Lady Gaga; so I’ll refrain from judgment. Nevertheless, LIGHTS was totally a punker kid — or so she claimed. I’d say that in terms of rock, she was less punk and more Fraggle, but that’s neither here nor there. The point is that the girly girl Whitney Eve collection didn’t seem to be a perfect match. Nevertheless, Roxy thanklessly pushed forward, all but strapping the fickle starlet into an outfit for the concert.

Ultimately, LIGHTS opted for a blazer to wear over her shirt, but as luck would have it, the moment she stepped on stage, she eschewed the big black thing and dropped it on the ground where it sat dejectedly for the entire concert. Up in the balcony, Whitney looked on in horror as her baby collected dust by LIGHTS’ feet. She was not happy at all as this was supposed to be a giant break for her collection (actually, I’d say the break was having it publicized on MTV week in and week out for a few months now, but what do I know?). Whit-Whit soon found Roxy and chewed out her friend for failing on all fronts. It was a refreshing change and part of the New Whitney, who has revealed herself to be a somewhat empowered, occasionally bossy young lady (earlier in the episode, she commanded Roxy’s photographer friend to take photos of her blazer — it was intense enough for Kelly to suggest that she relax a bit).

The good news for Whitney was that there were a few pics of LIGHTS wearing the blazer. The bad news was that she and Roxy were now finding strain in their friendship. As the episode ended, it looked like Roxy would be moving out of the cozy apartment the two girls share in the West Village. What will EVER happen (sadly, this is one plot that I don’t find terribly fascinating; so I really don’t care).

Over at Elle, things weren’t as catty as usual, but they still were fun. I’ll just give the quick synopsis: head honcho Robbie was to appear on The Martha Stewart Show in an effort to profile new up and coming designers. However, her segment needed one more look; so off went Olivia and Joe to check out a designer named Prabal Gurung. Much chatter and excitement ensued, and Olivia wound up pulling a look that not only made it onto Martha Stewart but impressed nearly everyone at Elle, thus leaving Erin to simmer in bitterness at her computer.

The tensions between Team Kaplan and Team Palermo weren’t as intensely wonderful as in other episodes, but that didn’t matter because how could we deny the joy that was the pairing of Martha Stewart and Robbie Myers? On a show where passive-aggression is currency, it was only too appropriate that Martha should finally make an appearance. Surprisingly enough, Robbie devolved into a goofy little girl in the presence of Martha, ultimately telling her “You’re so pretty!” It was a remarkably cute but bizarre moment that perhaps only Robbie could pull off, thanks to that nifty power position she has as the editor-in-chief of a major magazine.

Of course, the next step will be to have Kelly Cutrone land a guest spot with Martha. I’m not sure how that would work out. Then again, Kelly can basically do no wrong, and far be it for me to wrap up this recap without mentioning how much I loved one of Kelly’s must subtle moves of the episode: her eyes darting between Whitney and Roxy. For those who may not know what I’m talking about, early in the show, as Roxy and Whitney talked about getting LIGHTS to wear the Whitney Eve line, Kelly stood over the two girls, her eyes quickly moving back and forth between them as the conversation ambled along. I wasn’t sure if Kelly was totally bemused, about to snap, or perhaps both. Either way, I loved it.

“Hey girls, do you like my pen? I love the way it writes! It’s so CAYUUUTE!!! LOVE IT!!!”

“I’m sorry, Joe, but I just find pens to be terribly unprofessional. Although, for the record, I do know the creator of pens personally. I can get an interview. And by that, I mean, I can’t get an interview.”

“Okay girls, there’s this Canadian singer who’s gonna be the next big thing, and you need to get her wearing Whitney Eve, and it’s very very very very very very very very very important that you do this because, let’s not forget, IT’S FUCKING FASHION WEEK!”

“Well, look no further. I am your gal! So the task is to screw EVERYTHING up, right?”

“Okay, Roxy. I trust you. Even though you’ve been nothing but a disaster since you joined this show, I trust you!”

Olivia: “Do you like my dress? It makes me look like I’m in the middle of an autopsy!”
“CAYUUTE!!! LOVE AUTOPSIES!”

Roxy: “Oooh, I like this look on you. It’s very homeless-ragamuffin-meets-JC-Penney!”

“So who else here hates this blazer as much as I do? RAH RAH RAH!!!”

Whitney: “That bitch! I’m so mad I could open my jaw a little and gasp!”

“Don’t we look CAYUUUTE together?”
“No. And I find you to be highly unprofessional.”

“Whitney, I did the best that I could! What do you want me to do? Go on stage with her and force her to keep the blazer on the entire show??”
“YES!”

“Good morning. We’re here with the editor-in-chief of Elle, Robbie Myers.”
“OMG OMG OMG OMG YOU’RE SO PRETTY!”

“Do you like the way I match the draperies? Can you even see me? I bet I look like a floating coffee cup, huh?”

Olivia: “Joe Zee, I just want to RIP OFF MY SHIRT and GIVE MYSELF to you!”
“Ew. Not CAYUUUTE!”

“Bitch.”

What did you think about the episode?