Everyone is crazy! That’s what we learned on part one of the tumultuous Real Housewives of New York City reunion. Each one of the women acted like a crazy person, even those that we generally like (Alex, Bethenny). I personally would be mortified to go on TV and act that way, but as a viewer, BRING IT ON! Last night’s hour of insanity was positively riveting, which I suppose is sad, but who cares. I signed away intellectual dignity sometime around season four of Big Brother.

Basically all the ladies fought last night. Alex got into it with Jill. Alex got into it with LuAnn. Ramona got into it with Kelly. And Bethenny got into it with Jill. That’s the abstract. Part of me wants to go into detail about everything, but then another part of me wants to hold back. There was just SO MUCH. I was actually overstimulated. When the hour was over, I could barely even remember what had happened.

Here’s what did stand out to me: Ramona’s treatment of Kelly. Clearly Ramoner has no tolerance for Ms. Bensimon, as evidenced by the fact that nearly anything Kelly said, Ramona brushed off with dismissive indifference. The best example came when Ramona lied about calling her daughter stupid just to make Kelly feel better. It was sort of brilliant.

Kelly, meanwhile, continued to make no sense whatsoever, often chiming in sanctimoniously whenever she could or accusing Bethenny of planting stories about her in the media. When Bethenny asked for specifics, Kelly could provide none, and thus the argument just dwindled into nonsense. This was actually a recurring theme of the night. It seemed as if all these women accused each other of planting stories, but no one could back it up. You’d think they’d just drop it after a while.

The truth is that fame has gotten to their heads and perhaps made them paranoid. This was a point driven home by Bethenny, who accused Jill of getting too big for her britches. Jill denied the allegation, but it doesn’t take a genius to know it’s true — for all of them. Just look at them sitting around the couches in their glamorous, pseudo-’80s best. Fame has gotten to them.

Perhaps what was most interesting and confusing of all was trying to parse the role of cameras in these women’s lives. There seemed to be a blurry line between the reality of their worlds and the reality show. A viewer asked Bethenny why she allowed the cameras to film her peeing for a pregnancy test. Bethenny replied that it didn’t seem like a big deal to her (but that Jason’s proposal, which was intimate and important, felt like a private moment to be shared off camera). Later, when Bethenny and Jill were going at it, Jill (who had been totally kissing up to Bethenny all episode) revealed that she had wanted to make amends off camera at Ramona’s apartment and that Bethenny had refused. Bethenny’s defense was that Jill shared everything on camera; so why not this? It seemed a bit hypocritical for both women, and watching them hammer out the merits of making peace “for real” off camera and then doing it on camera had my head spinning. These women’s lives are just totally warped.

On to the photocap…

Jill: “Bethenny, I truly wish you all the best. I want nothing but good things for you. I’m truly happy for you, and I know we’re in a bad place now, but I do hope we can be friends again at some point. I know I’m not perfect, and I make mistakes, but I just want to be friends.”
“Well, honestly, it’s going to be hard. The fame has gotten to you.”
“I’m sorry Bethenny. I didn’t mean that we were ACTUALLY through. It’s an expression. It’s what I say to Allie.”
Kelly: “You shouldn’t say that! That’s creepy!”
LuAnn: “Well I CERTAINLY wouldn’t say that. But then again, I’m not sure I’d remain friends with Bethenny. Would you believe she called me a snake? ME! A SNAKE! The mouth on that one. So nasty…”

LuAnn: “There Ramona goes again, being rude again. Would you believe she called my dress a snake? How nasty!”
Kelly: “When I make a fist, it’s to represent the systematic bullying, the SYSTEMATIC BULLYING, I TELL YOU, that we must endure.”
“Shhhh, darling. I’m trying to make a point to Ramona.”
“We all have.”
“No, I have.”
Alex: “AND SO HAVE I.”

Jill: “What? You don’t think my teal pumps match my outfit?”
LuAnn: “No, no, no, no, no, my love. It’s just that they’re, well, I don’t think I would wear them. Here, I wrote a song about it:”

When you find a shoe that’s really you
But the color’s wrong like an off key song
You must always put it back
Or else you’ll look just like a quack

Because shoes make a lady look classy
And colors really do look sassy
I always wear robin’s egg
But never, my dear, on my leg.

“I never wanted this. I never wanted our friendship to be like this. I don’t like the woman I’ve become.”
Bethenny: “You’re mean now. You only care about material things. You never do something good without asking for credit!”
“I don’t remember that.”
“It’s all about you!”
“Well, I don’t remember that either.”
“I don’t even know what film is. I don’t remember.”

“OMG OMG OMG. I can’t wait to wave to the camera like a five year old again!!!”

Jill: “Excuse me, Bethenny, but I specifically told you I was DVRing the Lost season finale, and you spoiled it for me anyway.”
“What was I supposed to do? NOT Tweet about it?”
“You should have said SPOILER ALERT!”
Andy: “Ohhhh, Spoiler Alert. That’s a good idea. You’re my Mazel of the week, Jill!”

Alex: “IIIIII’m Nicole Kidman!”
Ramona: “Ugh, Kelly, you’re an idiot. I’m sorry. That’s what you are. No, you know what you are? Déclassé. Sorry. That’s what you are! You’re déclassé.”
Bethenny: “And who caaaaaares that my dress is made of Hershey Bar foil?”

What did you think about the first part of the reunion?

57 replies on “REAL HOUSEWIVES PHOTOCAP: Everyone Is Crazy!”

  1. I think you’re totally right – they are all crazy. And I love every minute of it.

  2. oh and those pumps were louboutin 2010 winter collection. so that a stylist would put those on her NOW is also terrible. i think they were hers.

    1. Wow Jash! How is it that you know this?

      They are all crazy! I wish they would just show all three hours at once.

      1. Fashion Mags and shopping! They are def 2010 Loubs. I don’t care for the color but I have a fabulous pair in red.

  3. My favorite part was the constant eye rolling of Kelly.
    Can’t wait for part two.

  4. I could not believe when Kelly told Alex to ‘cross her legs!’ WTF? This is from Kelly who is constantly flitting about in dresses so short, her lady bits could come flying out at any moment. So rude to call Alex out on it in the middle of the taping and then turn to LuAnn and giggle like an idiot. She makes me insane… her inability to make a point is so aggravating as is the way she refuses (can’t) back up any of her crazy accusations. Bullying my @ss.

    1. Kelly is KOO KOO. All season long she’s been showing her vijayjay like we should all be fascinated with her GD twat.

      Kelly, Jill, and Luanne and all insufferable. It’s a tie between Jill and Kelly as to who takes 1st place.

  5. You’re right, they’re all out of their minds. I don’t even know who to side with anymore.

    Alex is still boring though and her explanation of why she’s all of the sudden an asshole didn’t really ring true to me. She obviously wants more camera time, and to accuse Jill of letting fame change her was hypocritical.

    1. Totally agree. Alex brings nothing to this show. I don’t care that Jill hates her or Bethenny loves her — I’m a plebe and I can’t stand pretentious horse-faced Alex, either in her ‘controversial’ current incarnation or before.

      1. I’m beginning to dislike her also. Now that she’s part of the “in” crowd, she’s brave enough to bully, intimidate and make false accusations as if they were true. As much as I think Kelly is obnoxious and mentally ill (perhaps even a meth addict), I don’t believe that she mentioned Bethenny’s name in the press, as Alex INSISTS she did.
        She seemed quite sincere during the show.Except forthe “shaking” when Jill came and her excuse: the drama. The real reason was that she didn’t want to lose her place in the “in” crowd and Jill threatens it. The way she keeps talking for Ramona and Bethenny during the reunion shows is really starting to piss me off. So declasse….
        Alex is the really the status-seeking social climber that her husband
        I am coming to believe that her opening comments on the show are really true. And to think I had her at #1 best housewife………

  6. favorite part of last night-Ramona saying she calls everyone “stupid” and Kelly shouldn’t take offense to that. She calls Avery stupid. Then Kelly saying you should never call your daughter stupid. Then Ramona telling Kelly she doesn’t she only said that to make her feel better! ROTFL! That was priceless. Ramona was on fire last night!

  7. “We were never friends and we never will be.” Jill to Alex. Way to change there Ms. Zarin.

    BTW Ramona – you are mid 50’s, I don’t care how Cameron Diaz you feel inside.

    Did anyone else notice that when Bethenny was calling Jill out on her change from nice Mommy figure to Mommy Dearest figure no one argued with that assessment. And I do believe that Jill is horrified at seeing her behavior and wants to change.

    KKB continues to be the dumbest piles of rocks. I hope she is the one leaving the show.


    1. We can only hope that Kelly leaves the show. I really can’t stand her.

      Bethenny is now the one holding the grudge and just needs to get over it. She doesn’t need to be besties with Jill anymore, but they can be friends again with some boundaries.

  8. I totally agree with Ramona going off on Kelly as the best part of the night. In the previews for the next episode, Ramona it seems goes off on Jill too. Can’t wait for it!

    The crazies are definitely out. And I’m no Jill fan, but I do feel she really has learned her lesson. It was actually kinda hard seeing her totally crumble last night.

    The Countess still seems unflappable though. I don’t know how she does it.

  9. I think I’m just OVER IT. Their fighting didn’t titillate me, it kinda upset my tum.

  10. I actually found this episode very painful to watch, and almost turned it off. THe pain between Jill & Bethany over the loss of their friendship was very real, very raw. The last 2 years I was team Jill, but I joined team Bethany this season. Still, as much as Jill has let the fame go to her head, and Bethanny can say some very mean things, their pain was very real, and neither of them knew what to do about it. They really loved each other, and whether or not they can (or should) repair their friendship aside, the break up of that friendship has clearly been so painful for both of them. It made me so sad.

    Although watching Bethany’s show last night, I’m about to quit her team. and join Team Jason (that’s her husband’s name, right?). And stop watching.

  11. Great episode (as always). Love Alex’s use of “Dear” when talking to LuAnn. And LuAnn using it back thinking she was ‘zinging’ Alex. Did she not get that Alex was making fun of the way the Countess always says “Darling”.

    Bethenny looked amazing! Her skin was flawless.

    Did anyone else notice how LuAnn wasn’t saying too much. I think she is trying to distance herself from Jill. She wasn’t jumping in there to defend Jill all that much. Do you think that after viewing the season she realizes how cheesy she looked this season whenever she was with Jill.

  12. This episode WAS overstimulating. There wasn’t really enough time to savor one bit of craziness before the jaw dropped at the next one. I just love that LuAnn now is insulting Kelly to her face without Kelly realizing it (maybe). “That’s why I told you not to go down on that vacation. You are a scared little rabbit and you have no chance against Bethenny’s wit and intellect and repartee and her AK47s.” But Kelly’s face darkened and she sat there trying to think REAL HARD so I think it may have insulted her. Can’t wait to see the LuAnn and Kelly bits!

    1. Omygoodness…. that was hilarious. Kelly’s big, crazy limbs and satchels of gold! HA!

    2. HB…I think you and I are from the same town….Love all of Cougar’s spoofs. As good as B-side, but on the animated side of the coin.

    3. HB..I think we are from the same town in CA. I love (and sometimes choke with laughter as I do here) at ALL of Cougar’s spoofs. He (or she) is as good as B-side, but on the animated side of the proverbial coin.
      Have you seen “On the phone with the Real Housewives of NJ?” This one and that one are my personal favs.

      1. bonbon – i’m in Encinitas. you?
        I just found Cougar’ videos and I love the voices for all the women. They all sound like Dorothy Zbornak.


          1. Who is Dorothy Zbornik, HB?
            Sorry about double posting. I didn’t think the first one went through as the computer went into wierdo (non-responding) mode.
            W. Glaucus St. 92024

        1. You know, Cougar’s videos are great, and I had actually been wanting to do some sort of animation things for a while now. I emailed him to see what sort of program he uses (not that I was going to copy his style), and he never wrote me back! Boo.

          1. he threw you shade? Not cool.

            Bonbon – Dorothy Zbornak was one of the Golden Girls. If we are going to be intertubes buddies you must be a GG fan. I worship Betty White.!


          2. The GG have always held a place in my heart. (Sorry I had to jump in here with some GG love)

            Long before the whole Betty White revival even, but that comes from being a child of the 80’s and having parents who firmly believed that the television could raise their child better than they could. Thank the Gods, that they also believed in exercise, travel and book learning.

            Or I could have grown up to be a fat taxi driver with a closet full of Miami inspired lounge wear. I would spend my free time having drinks on my lanai and at night I would be haunted by flash backs of my time in the Korean war. (Taxi & MASH were other big favs in our house.)

            But I couldn’t quite pin down what Cougar’s voices remind me of. Dorothy Zbornak is a perfect description.

          3. HB…so the one who played Maude before? Got to be. I did enjoy them back then. Especially since it took place in Miami and I was an right coast girl.
            Unfortunately, I am now an almost 5 year Left coast old lady.
            How do you upload a photo to this site, please? Yours is so frigging adorable. I am straight so have no fear.

  13. They are all pretty vile and they all believe their own press. They see themselves as famous instead of the fame whores that they truly are. Alex, Ramona and Bethanny just came out looking a bit better this season because of the fucking crazy, self involved, self important, delusional behavior displayed by Jill, Luann and Kelly. I am leaving Sonja out of this because she had to babysit the crazy one during the St. Johns trip, so she gets a pass.

    On a side note: seeing how Sonja dealt with Kelly in the midst of her nervous breakdown or as Kelly calls it, “her nervous breakthrough.” Yeah that makes a ton of sense, but this is coming from Kelly after all. But me thinks that Sonja has had some experience in dealing with someone that suffered a psychotic breakdown or has been around someone that had a bad drug experience. The girl knew was she was doing with Kelly- what to say to her- and she was really the only one that realized that Kelly was not all there and the ladies needed to work on defusing the situation.

    But all of these women are on the show to shill their products. Ramona tried to interject the word renew into every other sentence. We get it Ramona. Your new skin care line is out- called Tru Renewal. Your renewed, your looking younger, more beautiful, you feel renewed. Could it be because of your new skin care line?

    And Alex wanted more screen time because her book just came out. So if she could stir the pot and make herself more interesting then more people will show up to the book signing. Hoping to get some gossip.

    Bethanny and her skinny girl. We have been bashed over the head. I am surprised that she didn’t say she invented a skinny girl home pregnancy test. Two limes, soda water and tequila do not a margarita make.

    They are all just awful in their own ways. Some of them just happen to a little more awful. And some, urr one, is just insane.

    I am starting to think that Jill and Bethany staged the whole fight thing at first. Just to increase ratings and to explain why Bethany is leaving the show for her own show. And I think that it just got out of hand and even though they were fake fighting, some of the remarks made started to hurt the other and it just snowballed from them. I think the there story arc was suppose to be the fight, the fall out from the fight and a nice resolution at the end of the season. But it didn’t quite work out that way and it got a bit real for the ladies.

    1. I agree with everything you have said except the last paragraph. Don’t think the fight was staged. It was a perfect PETTY fight for perfectly petty media whore housewives.

  14. Jill has clearly been her own worst enemy this season both during taping and after. She simply cannot get out of her own way and has shown herself to be both immature and mean spirited.

    But I think that some of the fan reaction to JIll has been what Bethenny would call disproportionate.

    The blogger and many of the commenters at the blog I Hate Jill Zarin, have been particularly vicious, slamming Jill for everthing she does other than breating, and going so far as to promote an effort to send Zarin sympathy cards (to console her for the loss of her fanbase, etc.) It’s not clear if this act of meanness and stupidity is related to Zarin’s recent claims of receiving threats in the mail.

    In an ironic turn of events this week the I Hate Jill Zarin blogger was caught behaving in the same way that she has called out Jill Zarin behaving in the same circumstances.

    An interesting and humorous take on the events: http://www.gather.com/viewArticle.action?articleId=281474978289611

    1. I think Lynnchicago has some issues. She takes hating Jill to an unhealthy level.

    2. If you say she was caught doing the same thing Jill does, then you DO NOT KNOW what your talking about. Jill is that you?

  15. I thought Bethenny let Jill off way too easily but the previews look like they’ll go back to it again. I want Bethenny to really smack her down because she was vile this year. She absolutely came into this season planning to destroy Bethenny and I’m so glad she failed and everyone sees how awful she is. I really hope Jill and Kelly don’t come back. In the mean time, I love Bethenny Getting Married? It’s all the good stuff without the agita.

    1. I agree. I was wondering why Bethany was letting Jill off so easy. I was wondering if Bethany was watching the same show that we were. That is why I think that something else is going on that the viewer is not privy to.

  16. Jill is a stupid, delusional cunt. I am sorry, but that is what she is. She is a cunt. She isn’t sorry for one thing that she has done or said. Also trying to say that her and Alex have never been friends. She sure acted like Alex’s friend at the start of the season. She even said that when Alex is on her team it is good, but when Alex isn’t it is bad. She is so striking out against Alex because Alex is siding against Jill.

  17. Jill made her bed and now she has to sleep in the rotting mess she made. No one is responsible for this other than Jill, period.

    Jill’s plan to bring a months old disagreement to season 3 in an attempt to change public opinion of her friend Bethenny backfired. Why did she want to do this? Just as Bethenny explained, Jill was mad that she wasn’t offered a spin-off and was jealous of Bethenny’s success. Instead of being happy for her friend, she was pissed. Her reaction? Take Bethenny out by any means possible.

    Jill’s claim that she wanted to resolve the issue in private because it was “real” doesn’t hold water since she is the one who made it public the first place. If this friendship was so dear, why save old voice mails to air on the show? Why spend a season bashing your friend (both in and out of the show)? Why dismiss Bethenny all 3 times she tries to reconcile with you on camera? Well, because a resolution was not part of the original plan. It was an afterthought due to Bethenney’s skyrocketing popularity and the huge outcry in regard to Jill’s season long ugly behavior. Jill believed that she could single handedly sway the viewer’s opinion and not only damage Bethenny’s new show but get Alex/Simon off HER show.

    She needs to just stop, breathe, relax and repeat. She’s gonna give herself a heart attack over something as stupid as a reality show – seriously.

    They make me tired. I’m glad the season is OVER.

    Love you b-side you rock!!!

    1. Couldn’t agree with you more. Jill was trying to make the show all about herself. She wants it to be the Jill show and be in control of each of the women, but no one is falling for it. If she wasn’t so self involved and narcissistic, she would realize that all the other housewives are also trying to make the show all about themselves. She would realize that she isn’t the queen bee of the show, the most important cast member and the women aren’t going to just allow her to take over. Jill believes herself to be the winner in the housewife/famewhore grudge match, but really the one that is has become slightly somewhat more “famous” is Bethany. It still disgusts me that people actually consider these women to be celebrities/famous/stars or whatever. They are entertainers. A not always good ones at that. I value the entertainers of the world- how else can I escape from my horrible life? But just because you are amusing or you entertain people doesn’t not automatically make one a celebrity.

      I would be way more star struck by meeting B-Side than I would if I ever met one of the housecunts.

        1. loved it anyway 🙂

          and totally agree…I would be way more starstruck to meet b-side.

    2. Totally agree with you on this.

      Amazingly, Ramona was the first one who really hit the nail on the head when she said Jill likes the underdog.

      And I think once Bethenny became popular and at the same time, great things were happening to her personal life (fiance, baby, new show), Jill’s stranglehold on Bethenny became too suffocating which is why Bethenny wanted to distance herself from Jill. Jill got resentful and lead to her completely horrendous behavior this season.

      1. Yup. And Bethenny made it clear that it started to become uncomfortable to share good news with Jill. The first person she told about the spin off was Jill and her reaction was not good. In order to keep the peace B started to pull back. Eventhough they were sparring, they were on speaking terms via emails and texts so when Jill began season 3 by playing the 3 month old “get a hobby” vm from B it was the unveiling of Jill’s “get Bethenny” plan.

        ‘Course we all know now how this completely backfired and only made Bethenny look better. If Jill had just let life play out I don’t know if Bethenny (or Alex) would have the fanbase they have.

        Go away Jill – haven’t you done enough?

  18. OK. I know this will not be popular, but I’m gonna say it anyway.
    Bethenny talks TOO much. I think if you counted the words that she spewed and the words Jill (and everyone else) spewed, B would garner 300x the amount.
    And that voice of hers: so sorry ladies and gents…I hardly got through “Bethenny gettng Married?”. Barely made it. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ….
    Spare me her chattering and notice, too, she used “Like” as much as Kelly did on the show. I couldn’t believe it, but it’s true.
    They ARE all crazy (Love it), Ben, and except for Sonja, believe their own myths. Although, I do admire Luann and cannot fathom why. Even with her olive toes: LOL.

    1. I cannot stand B’s voice. It’s almost as bad as Jill’s.

      I cannot watch B’s show–I simply cannot take that nasal screeching voice for an entire hour on her own.

      And her husband is BOR-RING! A big yawnfest, it looks like.

  19. I know I am alone here, but I fricking LOVE THE COUNTESS! She makes me laugh my ass off! When she sang “Money Can’t Buy You Class” on the show, the way she came sauntering down those stairs, “Hello, Everyone… I’m LuAnn, but you knew that already- Welcome to … ” It was just so cheesy, seventies, loungy and I LOVED IT! I love her hautiness and her sneaky gossipy ways.
    I think she may actually be my favorite housewife. She is fricking hilarious! (And I DIG that song- totally cheesy lounge music!)

    1. Add me to the list of Countess fans — I adore her for all the reasons you state — her intro to that cheesey song (which I can’t get out of my head) was FABULOUS!!!

  20. bonbon – ‘Fun new features of b-side blog’ post included a link to gravatar where you can upload an avatar and it will automatically appear here & other sites:


  21. Jill’s faulty memory must also have been work when she “revealed” that she’d wanted to speak to Bethenny privately during that reconciliation fiasco at Ramona’s pad and insisted that Bethenny refused to do that. If you watch that episode closely, you’ll see that it was actually Ramona who suggested that Jill and Bethenny talk privately in a bedroom, not Jill. And Jill flatly rejected that suggestion; refused to even consider it. She then went on to whine about not being ready and feeling ambushed because she didn’t have her “notes” with her and so on.

    Plus, if Jill did really want to speak to Bethenny off camera, she could have called Bethenny, written to Bethenny, or walked over to Bethenny’s apartment at any time. They only lived about a block away from each other. Even if each of those things was just too painful to Jill to initiate on her own, she could have simply agreed to a meeting when Bethenny called her the previous week to try to arrange one. You remember that phone call? The one where Jill lied to Bethenny about her reasons for using speakerphone and secretly allowed Luann to listen in? Instead of agreeing Bethenny’s request for a face to face meeting, Jill basically told her to go fuck herself, then reiterated that this would never happen by yet again declaring ” You know what, Bethenny, we ARE Done!,” then hanging up on her.

    I don’t know if Jill is even capable of telling the truth any more. But that’s exactly why I’ve enjoyed seeing her on the reunion so far. I just love seeing Jill Zarin get tangled up in her own web of stupid, self-contradictory lies.

Comments are closed.