Tatiana Takes A Final Bow

Well, the gig is finally up for Tatiana Del Toro, who certainly brought the crazy for a spectacular flameout on American Idol last night. It was the Wild Card round, in case you hadn’t heard, and Tatiana pulled out all the stops — she did her crazy laugh, she squealed with emotion, and she even busted out a brand new Puerto Rican accent à la Jorge to perhaps muster some sympathy or tears from Paula, who notably cried the other night during Mr. Nuñez’s emotional moment. Unfortunately for Tatiana, Paula immediately called her out for the new accent, but hey, no problem. Tatiana just blatantly stole Jorge’s bit, saying when she gets excited, she too can only think in Spanish. Riiiiight. Hey, I didn’t mind. I thought it was hilarious. This girl is desperate for fame, and she’ll do anything for it (even give Ryan a fake BJ). Normally I’d find it kind of repulsive, but with Tatiana it’s just sort of massively hilarious.
Alas, her fatal flaw was singing “Saving All My Love” by Whitney Houston yet again. This was now the second or third time she’d performed the song (or at least covered Whitney), and unsurprisingly, this lack of variety did not wear well with the judges. To her credit, I actually thought she sounded better than the first time. In fact, I thought she sounded really, really good. If she had chosen a different song, she might have very well have moved forward, but sadly she claimed that one day was simply not enough time to learn a whole new song — or at least one that was as good as the Whitney classic. This elicited doubt and anger from Simon, and it was clear that her unbelievable streak of second and third and fourth chances was going to come to an end. Sure enough, the judges gave her the big “Smell ya later!”, causing her to break down in tears and then eventually fall to her knees before the judges as if they were some panel of ancient deities. It was one of the most bizarre Idol moments ever, and for that, we’ll never forget you Tatiana. Never…

As for the rest of the group, they all did pretty well. There really weren’t any stinkers in the bunch. Oh, except Von Smith whose shaky falsetto summoned equal parts cringing and laughter in my apartment (in attendance: me, Sly, and another friend who I don’t have a nifty moniker for). Poor Vonny. What happened to the squealing gay boy who brought the women of The View to their feet? Instead, we only had a shell of a man — a scared little bunny so eager to please the judges that all of his personality (as annoying as it is) went right out the window. Maybe next time, buckaroo.
Ricky Braddy certainly showed more personality, but for some reason, the judges weren’t having it. They agreed he was better than last time, but his song choice, “Superstition” by Stevie Wonder, didn’t blow them away. I could see what they were saying, but I still would have put him through. I’m not sure who he could replace though as Matt Giraud did a great job, and Anoop, while not as strong, is very likable.
Speaking of Anoop (who my friends shockingly detested), apparently he filled out lucky number thirteen in the cast. Yes, we have a top thirteen this season, not top twelve, and I say “apparently” because I didn’t actually see that part of the show. The hour ran long, and my DVR cut it off, which meant I wasn’t able to see Anoop or Matt earn their much coveted spots in the finals. Oh well. I’m sure it was delightful.
As for the rest of the girls, Jesse Langseth returned for an occasionally shaky but overall strong performance, which was nice, but we all knew she would never be moving forward, especially after the judges all but gushed over Megan Corkray later on. To Jesse’s credit, she was slightly less insufferable than in the past, but I nevertheless applaud the judges for nipping that burgeoning awfulness in the bud. Megan, meanwhile, is very good and totally effortless on stage — at least vocally. I’m not sure I can the same about her little chicken waddle dance. It’s a bit strange (and oddly reminiscent of the Charmin Bears sidling up to a tree). I also wonder about Megan’s range. Can she pull off a bigger song? I’m not sure. I still think she’s gonna get eaten up later on by the competition.
The biggest turnaround of the night had to be Jasmine whatsherface, who finally lived up to her potential with a super strong take on the world’s sappiest Cristina Aguilera song. Like Kara, I was kind of shocked Jasmine didn’t follow the judges’ advice and take on something upbeat and fun like Rihanna, but she still nailed it and easily secured a spot in the top thirteen. It was a massive turnaround considering her dreary attempt at Sara Bareilles last week.
So all in all, I’d say a good showing by the Wild Cards. Again, I might have preferred Tatiana over Megan, Ricky over Anoop (just barely), but I really can’t complain too much about the picks. The judges did a fine job — certainly better than America (cough, Michael Sarver, cough, Scott McIntyre, cough, Adam Lambert). Now, let’s bring on the top thirteen!
What did you think about the Wild Card show? Agree with the results? Thoughts on Tatiana?