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In case you haven’t been watching Real World: Hollywood, do yourself a favor and spend this weekend catching up on every episode. After reaching a total creative and casting nadir with Real World: Denver, I thought the series was dead. It no longer seemed relevant or remotely fascinating. I stopped watching, and for the first time in ten years, completely missed an entire season (Sydney). But then came Hollywood. I had to watch it because that’s where I live. Little did I realize that this new season with its revamped format would serve as the return to form that this franchise has so desperately needed. Yeah, there’ve been some good later seasons (I enjoyed Key West and San Diego), but the truth is that ever since Vegas, the storylines had become tiresome, and the cast members boring drunks who merely drone on for episode after episode about stupid hookups made when stupidly drunk.
This time around, the drama has felt bigger, better, and more riveting. The entire saga of poor Joey, the livewire addict who went from Incredible Hulk to rehab specialist, was more fascinating than most anything else on TV this spring. Plus, actually getting a cast with real career goals (even if they are in entertainment) makes a huge difference. There actually does seem to be a relatable through-line to the season: how to get your ass in gear when everything around you is tempting you to do otherwise. The show is relevant again (for the time being).
That’s not to say it’s without its old charms. Take, for instance, the clip above the clip here (obnoxiously, MTV doesn’t allow the clip to be embedded in blogs). Sarah, one of the most judgmental girls in the house, gets a bit too tipsy at dinner, and well, vomit ensues. Ah, but the best part isn’t the puking (although, it’s pretty good). The best part is her vitriolic rant at the very end of the clip. To paraphrase her, “Probably shouldn’t have been drinking. Probably shouldn’t have been puking all over the sidewalk.”
Nevertheless, a photocap of Wednesday’s show after the jump…

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“William, I’m a very direct woman. If I do not get a goodnight kiss, and please understand that I have controlling interest in Denver Carrington, I shall fire you all on the spot and replace you with a boyfriend that will approve of the kiss.”

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“And he was like ‘You can’t wear short shorts to court’ and I was like ‘What you talking about?’ and he was like ‘It’s indecent,’ and I was like ‘I wore this to my grandpa’s funeral.’ Anyway, I blew him and it was all settled.”

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“Don’t you get it? I’m improvising AWKWARD SILENCE!”

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“Hi. I’m Nick. And my head is PERFECTLY ROUND.”

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“See? It’s like a pea! Or the sad Zoloft ball!”

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Kim: “Welcome to the house! Just don’t be ghett-oww or anything.”

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“Well the big news is that we have new STDs that we’d love to share with you.”

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“TAKE US. ACCEPT US. MAKE US MARGINALLY FAMOUS!!!”

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Shaggiest couple in Real World history?

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“Wow, you’re so much lighter than Janelle.”

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“I gotta kindergarten crush on this sandwich.”