B-Side Blog Goes To Disneyland!

This year, Disneyland has been running a promotion allowing people to visit the theme park for free on their birthdays. It just so happens that I turned a year older last week; so I happily took advantage of this offer and headed down to Anaheim for a day of whimsy and make-believe (which is not unlike my normal afternoon). Joining me on this adventure was Lil Grans and none other than IndianJones, who was back in the ‘hood for the weekend. Jash and Sly were also hoping to make the trip as well, but work obligations kept them away from the Happiest Place on Earth (or “the happiest place in the world,” as IndianJones mistakenly called it).
After the jump, some photos from our day at Disney.

We arrive just before noon on Friday, and after parking in a giant structure, we must board a nifty shuttle to take us to the park. And so our adventure begins.

HA — these people totally missed the tram. SUCKAS!!!

At this point, I realize I’ve taken about a dozen photos after only having traveled about ten feet on the tram. I decide it’s time for restraint.

IndianJones, meanwhile, grabs the camera away from me and snaps a shot of the parking structure. He fears that we’ll later forget where we parked. The Daisy Duck escalators, obvs.

Eventually we make our way through the turnstiles and head into the Magic Kingdom. Mirth awaits!

As the Holidays are just around the corner, the entire park is decked out in extensive Christmas decor — as evidenced by this tree.

Here we are walking down Main Street USA, which reminds us that this is just the way America SHOULD BE: safe, clean, and full of slow-walking people in oversized t-shirts.

IndianJones poses as a horse-drawn trolley approaches. Don’t let this otherwise pleasant photo distract you from his utter disdain for Middle America.

As it was my birthday, I was given a pin with my name on it. I was then told that Disney employees would now assault me with birthday wishes the rest of the day. This was patently false. Only two — TWO — people wished me happy birthday (both at the Haunted Mansion, curiously enough). Actually, a third guy wished me happy birthday and then followed me around, but I think he was a mentally challenged chap who was just looking to make conversation. It was awkward.

The Matterhorn looms over Tomorrowland. It shall soon be conquered.

Lil Grans caught off guard while the Little Nemo submarine (née 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea) putters along in the background.

Lil Grans and IndianJones waiting in line for the Matterhorn. They are clearly more excited than the rather dreary teens behind them.

After about fifteen minutes, we’re ready to board the Matternhorn. It’s my first time. As you can imagine, my heart is aflutter.

Lil Grans prepares for a high-speed alpine experience.

Technically, as we were a group of three, IndianJones was supposed to sit in my lap for the ride, but we all decided that that would be strange and uncomfortable in many different ways. As such, he received his own car.

After the Matterhorn, we enjoyed a healthy lunch adjacent to some dumb Jedi Training show for kids. My bacon cheeseburger was surprisingly tasty for amusement park fare.

At the next table over, a family (who was decided from the REAL America) up and left without throwing away their small army of cups. Never mind that the trash can was RIGHT NEXT TO THEM (as seen in the photo). I mean, I know we Americans are lazy and all, but all they had to do was reach over and place the cups in the bin. They didn’t have to even stand up if they didn’t want to. Jerks. (They were butt ugly too, which is a shallow observation but feels fitting nonetheless)

The Star Tours ride, which afforded IndianJones the opportunity to reveal his nerdy side. As we stood in line, a video feature advertised “trips” to the planet Hoth, causing IndianJones to roll his eyes and ask “Who would EVER visit Hoth?” A question for the ages.

How meta: me taking a picture of tourists taking pictures. Lil Grans informed me that he almost took a picture of me taking a picture of them taking a picture of Disneyland. That would have just blown my mind.

More tourists.

After having spent a good chunk of time in Tomorrowland, we then venture into New Orleans Square where we pause for pictures by the lake. Okay, it’s true. We’re just as dorky as everyone else at the park.

Our next destination is Critter Country. Splash Mountain beckons.

A casual afternoon flume.

I’ve been on many flumes in my day, but this was by far the wettest I’d ever been after one. Not sure you can see the details in this pic, but my face was covered in water. Also, props to the photobomber in the background behind Lil Grans.

IndianJones shows off his post-flume water damage.

Another victim of Splash Mountain.

Lil Grans fared the best of us, but he too had waterlogged pants for a good hour or two afterwards.

And then there was Space Mountain.

This pretty much sums that up.

Next, we visit the decidedly less thrilling Toy Story 2 ride. It’s a bit frenetic and annoying; however, we’re mildly amused by the color scheme, which perfectly matches IndianJones. I mean, WHERE IS HE? It’s like he’s just a floating head!

Errant marching band.

IndianJones at the Indiana Jones ride. Do the wonders never cease?

Soon the sun sets, and the lights come on. The charm quotient thus skyrockets. Unfortunately, we don’t DO charm. We head towards the exit.

Ah, but first we pause for dumb photos with Mickey ears.

Fun times.

And that was it. I tried to take a photo with Mickey, but he seemed to be MIA that day. I also never made it to “It’s A Small World,” which was unfortunate because I’ve never been, but by the time we got to it, the line looked to be about two hours long, and there was no way I was gonna wait more than fifteen minutes to see some figurines. Nevertheless, it was a delightful day and perfectly kicked off the birthday weekend. And no, I did not buy any ears…