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Well, the first season of The City came to a close this week, which means we’ll have to wait quite a bit before we can see the likes of Whitney or Allie or Olivia on our screens again. I’m kind of bummed because after enjoying the perils of Manhattan, it might be hard to switch back to the less intriguing superficialities of The Hills. Nevertheless, I was quite contented with this final episode, if only because Whitney didn’t take Jay back (as so many of the girls in this franchise tend to do). I was also happy because a (possibly drunk) Diane Von Furstenberg shared some lovely advice about love and absence and fire and wind. It was actually quite touching.
More importantly, however, Olivia was up to her old ways, stealing opportunities from Whitney such as a sweet gig in London (fake home of Alixe Boyer’s fake accent). I must admit that I was a little sad that Nevan (a.k.a. Bevan) didn’t make an appearance on the show. He’s been MIA of late, and that’s very not cool. There was also some middling drama with Allie and Adam, and long story short, they got back together (no surprise there). For her part, Allie looked more frail than usual as she seemed to prop herself up against any wall within a ten foot radius of her at any given moment. Nevertheless, the two models are back to boinking, which means we’ll have plenty of “Honey…” “Baby…” interludes in the near future, I’m sure.
Anyway, onto the photocap…

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“An opportunity in London!?! Isn’t that where Alixe Boyer is fake from???”

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“Whitney, I can’t be bothered with this. I’m late enough as it is to the Where’s Waldo party.”

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“Really, Whit? Bringing your personal problems into work? That’s just incredibly immature… Now, tell me about JAY!”

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“Hey Whit. How’s your less successful spin-off going?”

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“Adam accused me of always going behind his back and talking about him. Can you believe that? Can you believe that ADAM SAID THAT? Because he did.”

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“UGGGGHHH… I’m bored.”

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“All I’m asking is for you to give me the credit I deserve because let’s face it: without me you’re nothing, BITCH.”

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“I pulled the entire look. And I designed it too. I’m actually Diane Von Furstenberg.”

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Diane Von Furstenberg: “Who exactly are you?”

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“Don’t feel sad, Whitney. Let me tell you something: love is to fire what wind is to absence. No, no. I got that wrong. Fire is to absence what love is to chimneys. No, that’s not it either. You know what? How about we just go get some chalupas down the street, okay?”

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“Ugggh… Adam, I’m bored. You’re boring me.”

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“‘Allo, Whit! I’m back! I even showered! Oi! Crocodile Dundee!!!”

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“Guess what, Whit? I got the London job. I mean, it’s not surprising. My father lives in London. Plus, I’m Queen Elizabeth, but you knew that.”

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“Whit, I don’t know how much longer I can flare out my buck teeth. Just take me back. Oi! Baz Luhrmann!”

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“Smell ya later!”