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The best part about being a full-time writer is that I get to make my own schedule (most of the time); so when my old friend IndianJones proposed going to the beach on his day off from work, I was more than happy to accept the offer — even if it meant abandoning my bedroom/office in the middle of the day. However, just because I was away from my computer didn’t mean I was away from my blogging. I of course brought my camera with and documented all the excitement that ensued. One word: seagulls.

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My beach lunch of the day consisted of a Diet Coke, a turkey-and-brie sandwich (with Dijon), and a Snickers Bar.

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My towel. It was used liberally.

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Suntan lotion. Always an essential ingredient to fun in the sun.

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Cool shades.

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Of course, I needed a tote to carry all these items. This one was on loan to me from my friend, Jash.

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The tote toting.

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And, of course, board shorts.

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IndianJones arrived, and I was ready to go.

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But first I had to transfer my perishables to his cooler bag.

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And what a fine bag it was.

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The commute to the beach began. This was the first of many dumb license plates we encountered. I mean really. SOUL HUG?

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I took a picture of this parking enforcement thing because it reminded me of one of the robots in WALL-E.

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We arrived at the Pacific Coast Highway, and what the hell? IT’S CLOUDY?!?!?! I hate the West Side!!

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Another intriguing license plate.

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As you can tell, the forecast did not attract many beach-goers.

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Nevertheless, we set up camp. My towel reflects my lifestyle, obviously.

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IndianJones promptly commenced a face-down nap.

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Despite the overcast skies, people still hit the waves. The guy in the foreground was a huge idiot. You may notice a large, opened bag of Cheetos by his side…

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Well, the seagulls noticed the Cheetos too.

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Cheetofest 2008!!!

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These birds attacked that bag. The guy didn’t even notice.

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Here’s one bird with bounty in beak.

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That gull was so psyched.

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And there’s the idiot. Just lying there. I would maybe give him a pass if he were asleep, but…

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…as you can tell, he’s very much awake.

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At this point, the bag was pretty much depleted, but the gulls still hung around. No one wants a good party to end.

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They kept pecking at the bag, thinking it might yield some bonus Cheetos.

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Soon, the wind picked up, causing the bag to blow my way.

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But was I going to tolerate a flock of seagulls entering my personal space? No. I grabbed the bag, made eye contact with the guy, and said loudly to IndianJones, “I guess I’LL throw this in the trash since no one else is going to.” It was pretty prissy, but hey, how else should I feel when someone lets their trash just waft into my area? The idiot didn’t even say thanks. He just went back to sleep. I wanted to throw sand on his face.

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Asshole.

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It was quite breezy by the ocean.

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And ever so slightly cold.

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I dipped my toes in the surf, and it was kind of chilly. I sort of wanted to swim because I was in my bathing suit, but I just didn’t know…

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I mean, just look at this water…

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After I saw an old man and a little girl go frolicking in the waves, I realized I could do it too. That’s me in the middle of a tsunami.

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It was cold.

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Very cold.

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But I actually got used to it, and it turned out to be rather lovely. A good choice indeed!

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Finally, it was time to leave.

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As we headed out, we saw a seagull sitting on top of a Lexus. It amused us greatly. Nature’s triumph over man?

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Oh, and one more dumb license plate.

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And you thought the day was over, didn’t you? I then met up with Jash, and we went to the Hollywood Bowl.

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A little Saint-Saëns action, if you will.

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It was pretty awesome, but unfortunately, there were these AWFUL people in front of us who were so loud. Two of them were texting the whole time, and one guy didn’t even bother turning his ringer off, despite being called several times. They were really obnoxious. I would have taken a photo, but they had the brazen attitude of cocky film producers, and I’m in no place to burn bridges in The Industry. Oh well. Thankfully, they left at intermission, but then another group of people took their seats, and they were equally as loud. They literally dropped three or four beer cans on the ground over the course of the second part of the show. (Shaking fist at the heavens)

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Overall, a fun day at the beach topped off with a great concert at the Bowl. And THAT, my friends, is how you do Los Angeles.