56

It’s Tuesday, which means we just saw another entertaining episode of Big Brother. Despite the presence of Evil Dick (I refuse to call him Evel until I get a proper justification for that self-imposed typo), the show featured plenty of neat drama, not the least of which was found in the veto competition. I won’t say what happened here, but once again, if I have to hear James complain about being evicted one more time, I’m liable to march over to CBS Radford throw a croquet mallet at him. Does he not understand this? He’s not the only one who’s been kicked out of the house. Ryan was evicted too, and heck, Sharon actually went away to sequester! Oh well. What can you do?
Rather than recap the craziness, I decided to pull CBS’s screen shots again like I did on Sunday. Fun times after the jump…

2
“I’m nominated? But not for most modern hairstyle? This is TROUBLE!”

4
“These noms are great! G-R-A-I-T Great!”

7
“Yew know wut, Chelsia? Yew don’t owe me a hug, but ya kinda do!!”

10
“It’s funny, really. No one would ever suspect that I got my hair cut at Fantastic Sam’s. But I did.”

11
“Lying down like this is pretty crazy, but I bet I can top it…”

16
“There we go. MUCH crazier.”

17
“Don’t look at me, guys! There’s no trouble here!”

20
“Just kidding. There’s plenty of TROUBLE.”

21
“Yew knew wut, Joshuah? I am an avid movie fan. I rent them, okaaay? So yew don’t owe me silence during this movie, but ya kinda dew.”

23
“I fuckin’ HATE Sharon, that circle-faced CUNT! I wish she’d just take a noose and HANG herself, fuckin’ bitch whore.”

26
“I can’t read this. I think one of my retaahds wrote this.”

30
“Did I leave my good pair of Mom Jeans in here?”

37
“Question 1: Have you ever met Barry Manilow? Because I have. And that makes me hardcore.”

43
“Yew know wut, CBS? Yew don’t owe me a barf bag after this, but ya kinda dew!!!”

47
“Eh, I’ve swallowed worse.”

50
Oooh! ROCK AND ROLL CROQUET!!! This is almost as good as HEAVY METAL BADMINTON!!

51
Look! The carpet’s red! And there are notes on the wickets! Rock and ROWWWLLLL!!!!

54
And did I mention the keyboard walls and the saxophone decoration? It’s like being on tour with Aerosmith! (Or at least Huey Lewis.)

59
“So I told that fucking cunt bitch whore slut, ‘I’ll turn as orange as I damn well want to, you fucking cunt bitch whore slut!”

59
“I am T-O-S-T toast!”

75
“God will smote them! S-M-O-T-X-B-A-V-N-T-O-A-T smote!

84
“Don’t speak to me, Chelsia. I’m being crazy.”

87
“Fine, James. But I’ll have you know that I am feeling very troublesome right now. And that’s not just because I have a very modern haircut.”