A few months ago, I witnessed a seagull carrying a bagel around in its mouth  an image that proved to be so endlessly entertaining to me that I whipped out my camera and documented the entire experience. Things have been pretty quiet on the bird front since then, but yesterday, the wing’d ones returned thanks to the sudden appearance of a scone on the rooftop next door. I have no idea how or why a scone wound up on the roof, but it did, and I won’t question it any further, lest the mysterious scone gods focus their wrath on me. Anyway, word spread across the seagull blogosphere very quickly, and soon there was an entire flock circling overhead as if a barge full of chum had moored just outside my window. I saw the scone, I saw the gulls, and I saw potential. I immediately grabbed my camera and snapped as many pics as I could. I felt like a paparazzo. Except instead of celebrities, I was stalking seagulls. Hmmmm… doesn’t have the same cachet.
First I noticed many gulls gathered on the roof, which was strange given that I’m nowhere near the ocean (relatively speaking). They seemed to be having a rather pleasant time. A veritable garden party for seagulls.
As more birds descended on this happenin’ rooftop, I saw the prized possession which had allured them down from the heavens:
A SCONE!
Seagulls arrive from distant lands, all to get a glimpse of that tasty (and presumably stale) scone.
Maxine tries to grab the scone with her beak, but it’s a bit too unwieldy for her. And let’s face it, she’s a drunk. Lisette observes quietly, knowing that her time will come soon enough.
As Charles walks by, Maxine defies expectations and manages to clasp onto the scone. Lisette is understandably peeved.
Suddenly, the gathered birds abandon the scone and fly off for some reason. Something has clearly spooked them…
Suddenly Gillian and Rita arrive. Hmmm… that was awfully convenient. Clearly they created a diversion for the seagulls. Methinks these pigeons are up to no good.
Gillian is totally eyeing that scone. If she pulls this off, it’ll be a major coup for pigeon-kind.
Sure enough, the gig is up. The gulls return and claim the scone for themselves once again. A pigeon can dream though, right?
Lisette sees her moment and goes for the scone. Gillian, however, hides out in the shade, planning her next move.
Lisette triumphantly grabs hold of the scone. She’s doesn’t care that Maxine had dibs. Lisette’s worked too long and too hard for this moment.
A small crowd gathers around Lisette as she proudly shows off her bounty for all to see.
Little does Lisette realize that the other birds are merely masking their disdain. Gillain, meanwhile, is totally snapping a picture on her cell phone and sending it to the other pigeons: “OMG. Look at this BITCH!”
As for Maxine, she seems to have come upon a dinner roll of some sort. It’s no scone, but it’ll do.
Having appropriately paraded about her scone for the masses, Lisette flies off with her prize.
Life is good for Lisette.
It’s always Maxine, Maxine Maxine. But not today. Today is Lisette’s moment!
She’s earned this, dammit, and she’s going to ENJOY IT!
BUT ALAS! In a not totally unexpected twist of fate, Lisette loses hold of the scone, which falls down to the pavement below (yet ceases to break, oddly enough). Surely this must have shocked Trish, who, as you can see, was just chillin’ there reading Nora Roberts.
Meanwhile, fortune shines on those gulls that didn’t get to enjoy the scone. A Dorito mishap turns into an all-out feast for the hungry birds.
Sucks for Lisette…
However, apparently the Doritos are not well received as the birds quickly abandon the delicious snack food.
Up on the roof, Maxine comes to the sad realization that perhaps this dinner roll may be too difficult for even her to devour.
Maxine reflects on her friendship with Lisette. What went wrong? They used to be so close.
Hank arrives to try his hand at the dinner roll.
BOOYAH!
Is it some sort of biblical omen to see a blackbird carrying a roll in its beak?
Poor Tina. She missed everything.
