When the good people at Bravo sent me pics of almost all the Real Housewives doing a fashion show at tonight’s A-List Awards, I simply couldn’t resist the urge to do a photocap. I could go on about how all the women look more or less terrible and how the clothes all seem to be unflattering and how I hope that at least one of the pieces comes from the SHE By Sherayay line, but why bother? The pictures speak for themselves.
Photocap after the jump…
“It’s too bad Mario isn’t here to see this. I guess he’s still stuck at the Douche-list Awards.”
“Did somebody ask for the HOT Housewife? Because here I am! And I’m twice as hot as anyone else. See? 1, 2. That’s two fingers. One finger for each multiple of hotness that I have. And I have TWO. So I’m TWICE as hot! Sizzle!”
“Suck it, Tamra.”
“I’ll show Kelly Bensimon who’s Kelly Bensimon!”
“You know what, audience? You need to chill out. You’re being completely inappropriate. I’m up here, and you’re down there. Literally. I’m physically above you.”
“WELL LET ME TELL YOU: ladies, don’t get your hopes up for any of these dresses because the day after you buy one, your husband will leave you, and you’ll spend your days eating Ho-Hos and cheese doodles and watching old reruns of Judge Judy. Next thing you know, you’ll plump up like a blimp on Super Bowl Sunday and no one will ever want to look at your fat ass again, least of all your asshole sons â€â€Ã‚ but it’s really not their fault. It’s yours. Just laying it all out there.”
“It’s quite pleasant in here. Is the air conditioning on? And what is air conditioning anyway?”
“I’M A MAN.”
“Let’s get some drinks and dialogue up in this bitch, y’hear?”
“Not many people know this, but I’m a thigh double for The Rock.”
“My love tank is still empty. Who here wants to DO ME?”
“I can’t wait to get backstage and stab Gretchen in the eye.”
“Do you like this dress? It’s made from dyed MONEY.”
“Now excuse me, I’m off to have sex with George in a bed made of MONEY.”
“BAM! Fashion!”
“Seriously, if we have to stand here together any longer, some bitch’s gonna get cut.”
“We’re awful!”
“Are we the best drag queens you ever saw or what?”