HOUSEWIVES PHOTOCAP: Kids Behaving Badly

Was The Real Housewives of Orange County ever this jaw-dropping? Once again, an episode has left me floored by the lack of manners and courtesy on display — but here’s the shocker: it wasn’t Vicki or Tamra exhibiting the offensive behavior. This time around, it was none other than Jeana’s kids Shane and to a lesser degree Colton who proved to be absolutely despicable. The boys — particularly Shane — ferociously demeaned their mother, frequently using the f-word and other disrespectful language. The poor woman has become a human punching bag, and it’s true that these kids don’t know any better, thanks to their dad, but that doesn’t mean Jeana should just sit there and take it. I think anyone who watched the show last night wanted to reach through the screen and slap the douches upside the head. Vicki looked like she was about to flip the table while Kim seemed more quietly shocked, probably fearing her young son would misinterpret any of this as acceptable behavior.
I do wonder if when Shane watched this episode if he felt any sense of shame or regret. I imagine no. He has the maturity level of the silicon in Tamra’s chest. I can’t even imagine what sort of a doormat Shane’s girlfriend is. And yes, I should mention that Shane’s girlfriend is named SHANA. Really? Really? Poor Colton, meanwhile, is still young and impressionable, and it’s clear that he looks up to his big bro. It’s also clear that he follows his lead, which is probably why he was pissier than usual this episode. Of course, the saddest part of all is that both these kids are gonna start their own families at some point and the cycle will continue.
And speaking of troubled kids, let’s look at Lynn’s spawn, affectionately known as #1 and #2. The younger daughter, Alexa, seems to be okay, but that older one, Raquel, is a real piece of work. Sure, teens drink, but she was pulling some brazen moves. I enjoyed how Lynne acted so defenseless, continually saying how hard it is to keep kids out of trouble. How about you start by saying “NO.” Or maybe “You’re not allowed to go to Las Vegas for the weekend with your boyfriend at 15.” Just thinking out loud…
Anyway, onto the photocap…

Vicki: “You’re all my people! Well, not you Jeana. You’re more like my depressing friend who always befriends my enemies passive-aggressively. But the rest of you: my people!”

“It’s my love tank: it’s emptying…”

“Okay, Mom. Time to get that facelift so you can be just as HOT as me!”

“Here, Mom. Let me impart some of my HOTNESS to you for good luck. Don’t get burned!”

Behind the scenes of Alien

“Come here, Alexa. You’re my favorite daughter. And you’re the prettiest!”

“Alexa, put some heart into it! You know, your sister is a much better player. She’s also my favorite. And prettier.”

“So, Gretchen, how are you enjoying your very boring story this week?”

“This is mine!”
“No, it’s mine!”
“Give it!”
“No, YOU give it!”

“Woohooo!! It’s like BASS LAKE all over again!”

“Cheers to terrorizing Chicago!”

“Vicki, don’t go there about my kids. I think I raised them very well, thank you very much.”

“Please, someone get this shaggy dog off my cheek!”

“Look! Mom and Dad in ’86! Isn’t it funny how much HOTTER I am than them?”

“What did you say??? I’m the HOTTEST woman you’ve ever seen in your life???”

“Hey Jeana, where’s your douchebag son?”
“I don’t know. He probably won’t even say hi. Knowing Shane, he’ll just say ‘Go fuck yourself’ or something like that. Hahahahahaha. KIDS.”

Mascot: “Hey, Jeana. Your son wanted me to tell you to go die, you fuckin’ bitch.'”
Jeana: “Sounds like someone’s grumpy. What can you do? KIDS!”

Vicki: “WHOOOHOOO!!!! Hey, wait, Jeana — Shane just gave you the finger. And now he’s hanging you in effigy! And now he’s lit the dummy on fire! And now he’s kicking it in the stomach! And now he’s pointing at you and pretending to shoot you in the face!!”
Jeana: “Well, he’s probably just a little tired today. What can you do? KIDS!”

“I could do two things: I could throw my fork at Shane or ask him to fill my love tank. I think I’ll throw the fork.”

“Shane! I’ve had enough! I’M the crazy one, and you’re making me look normal!”

“It’s funny — Tamra and I were just talking about all the things we have in common. We’re both blonde. We both love motorcycles. And we’ve both fucked her son!”

“I’m sorry, Gretchen. Am I scorching your cheek? I’M JUST SO HOT I DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW TO CONTROL IT!”
“Uh huh…”

“I have no future!”

What did you think about the episode?