BIG BROTHER PHOTOCAP: There's Not Enough Room For Both of Them…

We’re gettin’ down to the wire on Big Brother, and with Jerry’s Head of Household victory, the rest of the house has fallen into mild turmoil. Memphis has wisely made deals with everyone to get to the final two, which is pretty smart — assuming no one rats him out. Unfortunately for us fans of Renny, it looks like her time might be up today. After Memphis won the Power of Veto and saved Dan, the dynamo from N’Orleans had to go on the block, and given that everyone loves her, she will most likely go home. Keesha tried to play on Memphis’s distrust of Dan, but ultimately, she failed to convince him that taking him off the block would be dangerous. Had it been me, I would have blatantly lied. I would have told Memphis that I had an alliance with Dan to get Memphis out. You know, something to really prey on his paranoia. I guarantee it would have worked.
Alas, Renny and Keesha instead just gave Memphis concerned glares, which really didn’t do much. If Renny goes home tonight, I’ll be sad, but I’ll happily put all my goodwill into Dan, my #2 favorite in the house. And speaking of favorites, this week saw my most favorite-est veto comp: the traditional face mash-up. Yes, it’s the time when the producers go to town with some photoshop and mix two house guests together into one face. It seemed pretty easy this go around (especially compared to the one season where the house guests had to pick three names, not two), but shockingly, Renny took over twenty minutes to get it done. C’mon now. It shouldn’t have lasted more than 90 seconds. Oh well.
Nevertheless, here’s the photocap…

“Fuck you all. I’m bringing this fuckin’ cup to the finals.”

“Wait, my cup said WHAT? Fuck that shit. I’m fuckin’ throwing it in the trash!”

“It’s funny how everyone becomes your friend once you get HOH. It kind of reminds of a story. You ever hear the one about the giraffe and the butterfly? It’s actually pretty good…”

“…and so the giraffe tells the butterfly, ‘A traveler is only as stealthy as his pocketbook,’ and the butterfly says, ‘But if the pocketbook is made of wood, a fine jest is had by all.’ So the two went down the path until they reached the bridge…”

“Okay, you know what? Just vote me out. I can’t stand these stories any more. You win.”

“…and so then the giraffe sips from the spring and says, ‘I only taste water,’ but the butterfly says, ‘A sip on the lips is only as good as a drain on the brain.’ But the giraffe refused to sip again…”

“What’s that skywriting say? American Apparel… sale… on… V-NECKS??? GET ME THE HELL OUT OF THIS HOUSE!!!”

“HOOoonnkk!!! Who put this pool here? This reminds me of a story. Did I tell the one about the giraffe and the butterfly yet?”

“Believe it or not, the M on my hat stands for ‘Mona.’ I’m a pretty big Who’s the Boss? fan.”

“Come awn, DAN! Stawp it already. You’re testing mah nerves. It’s INAPPROPRIATE!!!”

“Did Dan just fuckin’ die on my bed? That’s fucked up. Fuck that!”

STEESHA: “I’m gonna grow up to be in the gay fuckin’ rodeo so FUCK YOU, you fuckin’ BITCH!”

MICHERRY: “Hey Ma, I just crapped my undahwears. HOOnnnnk!!!”

MEMBRA: “I would womanize you, but my feelings are hurt.”

RESSE: “MARY! ST. JOSEPH!! I’m not just a body, I’M A DOUCHE!!!”

BRANGIE: “Remember us? Neither do we.”

DAPRIL: “DO US.”

“Let’s see… that one baby has gray hair and looks like an old man. Definitely not Jerry!”

“You gotta wake up pretty early in the mornin’ to fool me, especially in New Orleans. We’re a good five hours ahead of California.”

“I don’t know if I trust Dan. He never wears v-necks, and that concerns me.”

“MARY! ST. JOSEPH!! My fate is locked. IT’S LOCKED!!!”