Disaster at Crate & Barrel!

I’ve always wondered what would happen should I or anyone else accidentally knock over one of the many fragile wares at Crate & Barrel. Would the staff level me with a stern eye and an unforgiving scowl? Would I be forced to pony up the dough to replace the unfortunate item I had so tragically destroyed thanks to the whims of my gangly limbs? Or would I be granted clemency for my accident with nary a penalty or fee thrown my way?
The answer, as it turns out, is the latter. Now don’t get excited. I didn’t break any damn thing. I may be awkward, but I’m not clumsy (necessarily). A fear of shards inspires me to move deliberately and carefully around all ceramic and hyaloid items in a store. However, others aren’t so thoughtful. Take, for instance, the idiot in Crate & Barrel yesterday who just breezed on through the place without any awareness of where any of his limbs might be at any given time. Well, when you play fast and loose, there can be dangerous consequences, which is why it perhaps was no surprise when a loud crash echoed mightily throughout the store (and Los Angeles in general). Everything in Crate & Barrel came to a halt as people swiveled their heads in the direction of the noise, first determining what had broken and then who the hapless offender was.
Luckily for this dude, he had only shattered a benign wine glass (as opposed to an entire shelf of ornamental vases and carafes, as I was hoping). It was only a minor accident, but merchandise had been destroyed, and surely he’d have to face the consequences. IndianJones, jash, and I waited with bated breath to see what pray tell would happen to this awful, awful man. The results: NOTHING. A lovely young Crate & Barrel worker smiled at him politely, which I suppose meant that he was off the hook because he then shrugged, made a strange face reminiscent of Charles Nelson Reilly, and then scampered out of the store as quickly as possible — somehow managing not to ruin more inventory in the process. The saleswoman, meanwhile, fetched a broom and a pan and quickly cleaned up the mess. I must admit that the lack of passive-aggressive glares on her part was highly disappointing; however, she earns points for briefly stepping away from the scene, thus affording me a chance to snap a photo of the horrific crime scene.
And so the great Crate & Barrel Disaster of 2010 came to an end. Now we know what happens when you break a glass at Crate & Barrel. I certainly feel enlightened, and I hope you do too.