Survivor is nineteen seasons old, but you wouldn’t know it based on how fresh and exciting it still is. In fact, I don’t think I’m being too hyperbolic when I say that last night’s episode might very well rank up there with some of the all time best. It was so thrilling, so entertaining, so hilarious, and so fun that I all but ran around in circles of joy (but I didn’t — instead I texted and emailed everyone I knew who is an equally diehard Survivor fan).
If you haven’t seen last night’s show, stop what you’re doing and head directly to your DVR. Do not read another word. Just sit back and enjoy the ride.
For everyone else, a photocap after the jump.
Honestly, this season has been spectacular. There have been some critics (ahem, Andy Dehnart), but even those myopic, taste-impaired, generally LOUSY people (oh I keeeed. Andy is wonderful… for a jackass) are coming around to Samoa, especially after the blindsides of the past few weeks. But let’s put aside the Tribal Councils for a moment and talk about Russell. This guy was supposed to be the villain of the season. Specifically, CBS billed him as the biggest villain of all time. And yet everyone I know loves the guy. Why? Because he is smart and having fun. You wanna hate him, but the dude lives up to his word. He’s playing everyone magnificently, and the fact that he’s three for three for immunity idols (two of which came with NO clues), is astounding. And yes, you heard me correctly: three for three. Russell indeed found the immunity idol YET again last night, and no less brilliantly. When he saw Dave hunting around a highly suspicious location, Russell managed to distract the guy, leading him off in another direction before secretly returning to the spot and claiming the idol for himself. Genius. I don’t care what you say about the guy, he’s certainly one of the best Survivors to ever play the game.
Of course, it remains to be seen if he can even make it to the finals. Russell may have burned one too many bridges, but then again, the guy has nine lives, it seems.
The same can’t be said of Laura, who went home after a tense, deadlocked vote almost sent the cast members reaching for a stone. It was certainly the most exciting Tribal Council of the season (and there have been some doozies), thanks in part to the insane scheming beforehand. You see, the “Foa Foas” (I use quotes as that tribe is technically no longer in existence) were still down in numbers 6-4. However, Shambo had since migrated to their side, leveling the field at 5-5. Now it was merely a matter of getting another Galu to jump ship.
Sham tried to pull John over in an effort to get rid of her arch-nemesis Laura, but he was resistant. He wasn’t just about to cannibalize his own tribe. Meanwhile, as half the camp departed on a reward sponsored heavily by Sprint PCS (feel free to throw some sponsorship dollars here, Dan Hesse. I’ll be just as glad to pimp out your brand!), Mick and Jaison worked on Monica, who’s no idiot, but certainly not as bright as she might think she is. She revealed to them that she wanted John gone, but she stopped just short of forming any allegiances.
Well, when the Immunity challenge came and went, leaving Mick with the necklace around his neck, Laura was exposed. Everyone was keenly aware that the votes would go 5-5, which would lead to a tie vote, which would then lead to the dreaded pulling of the stones. No one wanted that; so Dave, Monica, and Brett (ie. the kid who doesn’t talk) hatched a fairly impressive plan. Monica would tell Galu that she’d vote off John (thus reinforcing her previous convo with Mick and Jaison). The hope would be that the four Foa Foas would then vote against John, leaving shambo to vote for Laura, and the five Galus to in reality vote for Natalie (they didn’t want to risk voting Russell in case he had the idol). It was a clever, clever plan. And a plan I wanted to see fail immensely.
Sure enough, Monica set it in motion by pleading her case to Russell and Jaison and Mick. She insisted that they don’t vote off Laura but instead go after John, claiming that if she were to “jump ship,” it should be for someone she feels comfortable in betraying. For a moment I was afraid her plea would work, but Russell smelled a rat (again, major points to him). He knew this didn’t seem right, and so for the second time this season, the Foa Foas took a Galu plan (hi Erik) and turned it on its head. Russell talked to John about it, but guess what? He had already caught wind of the scheme from Brett, and John wasn’t happy. Getting four decoy votes was a bit too close for comfort, as far as he was concerned, and he raised a very logical question: why the HELL hadn’t anyone consulted him before volunteering him to be the sacrificial lamb. He had a point. It was a major oversight by the likes of Dave, Laura, Monica, and Brett, and it underscored a full season of cavalier entitlement by this group — the same entitlement that alienated Shambo and put them in this bind in the first place (and let’s not forget this is the same group of people who brushed off the notion that Russell could possibly have the second immunity idol).
Anyway, John didn’t like being thrown into the fire, and when Russell proposed that he join their side and vote out Laura, he seemed happy with that — but still undecided. And thus we headed into yet another Tribal Council not quite sure of what would happen. It seemed like John was gonna flip, but not necessarily. And even if he did flip, how would he do it? And when? Needless to say, I was on the edge of my seat, squirming in suspense. Awesome television. Awesome awesome.
And now some pictures:
“Hey y’all! There’s sea turtle over here. Anyone mind if I stab it in the head a few dozen times?”
“I can’t wait to get rid of Laura and the yoga and the 90210 and the youngsters with their hair and the shirts and the Melrose Place and the Heather Locklear and the bitchslaps and the exploding buildings and the back to life again and the cheating and the Tori Spelling and the squabbles over the estate and the death and the inheritance and the mother. Sheeesh!”
“Well hello. I’m Dr. Mick Trimming. How may I help you today?”
“This is really uncomfortable, y’all. But it’s worth it to get my hands on that Palm Pre, courtesy of Sprint. The Now Network.”
“Hey y’all! I see a monkey over there in the trees. Want me to go over there real quickly and bash its face in, y’all?”
“Look at these pies! Made by Sprint CEO Dan Hesse with a recipe he found on the Now Network!”
“Mmmmmm! This hot dog tastes just like the ones from home. Except those I usually make myself — you know, by slaughtering a pig by hand and then ripping out its intestinal casings with my teeth.”
“So this is where my cheek is. Huh.”
“And this is where my chin is. Impressed?”
“Where are the children? Where are the children??”
“Is that a Slim Jim? Nope, just a caterpillar. Eh, I’ll eat it anyway.”
Okay, this is getting ridiculous.
Mick: “Can I keep my shirt on, Jeff? Or is it gonna be another week of blurring out my pubes?”
“I’m pleasant!”
Mick: “With this necklace, I, Dr. MICK TRIMMING, shall rule you all with benevolence and tact, and you too shall see the glory of man and his creations.”
Mick: “Okay, Dad. One more photo of me and Jeff, and that’s it.”
“Luckily, as I am totally safe tonight, I can just lie here and relax.”
“Stay cool, bro! It’s all part of the plan, bro! You’re gonna be safe, bro!”
“Hmmmm… I bet John knows where the children are, and he’s not telling me. Not cool, bro.”
Dave: “You know what I love doin’? Taking a kid by the neck and yellin’ ‘NOW YOU LISTEN TO ME! YOU STAY OFF MY LAWN OR ELSE I WILL SHOVE YOUR FACE INTO THAT JOHN DEERE!’ Scares ’em every time!”
Jeff: “Joining us now on the jury are Erik, and… some girl. Excuse me, Miss? Can I help you with something?”
“Shambo? More like ShamBITCH! Good one, me!”
“Jeff, I am not afraid to eat another man’s flesh if it will get me a million dollars. In fact, why don’t I start with you and yer pretty little dimples.”
Well, that’s embarrassing.
“Four votes Laura, three votes Nat. Looks like we’re going to stones! Yup! Can’t see any other outcome than that!”
Jeff: “Hey, where did half the votes go?”
Laura: “Ah dunno.”
“Laura, did you eat the votes?”
“Mmmm?”
“Laura, what’s in your mouth?”
“nuthin”
“You realize that even if you stuff the votes in your mouth, they’ll still count against you.”
“I on’t owe wha you talkin bout.”
“Uh, wait a second. Six votes against Laura? That can’t be right because we Galu are five strong; so unless someone flipped then… ohhhhhhhhh…”
“Jeff, I’m sorry. You meant to say ‘And now we draw stones.’ That’s okay though. We all make errors. Okay everyone, draw stones! Why isn’t anyone drawing stones?”
“Wait, what? I just got voted out? I don’t think so.”
“This is the best thing that’s happened to me today, y’all! Well, second best after I strangled that king cobra with my big toe and a palm frond.”
“This is like that time when I got fired from the ice cream truck.”
Erik: “This is amazing.”
Kelly: “And I’m Scarlett Johansson.”
Erik: “I mean, I think I literally just shat myself.”
Kelly: “And I literally just married Ryan Reynolds.”
What did you think about the episode? Who’s gonna go home next?
The episode was amazing. The Foa Foa have been the underdogs for so long. They are working for it. Nat reminded folks that she and Russ were on their first reward.
Russell deserves to win the Million finding the third idol was the cap, he is keeping Foa Foa together and It’s a great thing to watch.
Loved Eriks comments
What about the part where Laura/Dave consulted with John about numbers? Hello, it’s not rocket science….
Thanks B! I was anxiously awaiting this recap since it was such a great show. So glad that Laura is gone. Now I hope Monica is next. We gotta keep Brett around so I at least get some points in the Fantasy Survivor.
Dave is a moron. I do not understand why he would follow Russhole at all — what was he going to do if Russhole found the HII while he was standing next to him – wrestle it away? Just look for yourself.Turn over rocks.
Shambo’s hair freaks me out.It gets higher each week.
hb
Maybe if Russell was a child Dave would have been able to keep up with him.
Why didn’t everyone start looking like crazy for themselves as soon as they got back? Stupid people!
I admit I haven’t been watching the show. From my cynical perspective, Russell isn’t finding immunity idols because he’s a genius (or because someone else is an idiot). He’s finding them because the producers are desperate to keep him on the show. Finding/not finding a hidden object has to be one of the easier things for the producers to manipulate.
RWD- I’d be inclined to agree with you except for the fact that he found two of the idols with NO clues. Plus I have watched every episode, and I think that he’s just watched the show enough to know where to look. Why none of the others thought to look for the idol while the other team was on reward was their own fault, and the fact that Dave was INCHES from it and led astray by Russell was just ridiculous!
I don’t want Russell to win, but I’m glad that he’s still there stirring the pot!
“RWD- I’d be inclined to agree with you except for the fact that he found two of the idols with NO clues.”
That totally backs RWD’s point.
This has nothing to do with anything,but… DMB was on SNL this weekend, and all I could think was “SHAMBO ON SAX!”
here4beer — Word. hahahahahaha
hb
maybe I’m missing RWD’s point then Sherri, but NO it doesn’t back it in my opinion. He took it upon himself to go looking for them both times w/out clues b/c anyone who watches the show KNOWS that there is a possibility that there is an idol in each camp and they put them where they can be found and used. Do you think that the producers whispered to him to lie about his background and destroy people’s property as well? I don’t want to like the misogynistic little troll, but he DOES have a talent for making things happen around camp (good and bad). The only thing I blame the producers for is the amount of screen time he gets, but it’s not like it hasn’t been done before (Hatch, Boston Rob, Lex, Ozzie, James, Yau Man, Cao Boi, Penner…). They’re highlighting a polarizing figure.
Just throwing this out there but I don’t miss exile island at all. Russell uses logic to break down the location of the idol. He knows they hide it near big noticeable objects and that hasn’t failed him. Regardless I want to see Russell win, if not Russell then Natalie or John. By the way loved the caps!
Check out my writeup if you want.
http://telewatcher.com/reality/american-idol/russell-hantz-is-survivor-samoa-episode-10-review-predictions/
I’m supposed to believe that of all the hundreds of cast-members — many who study the show like a graduate program — only one has found multiple idols like this. Remember that you only see what the producers *want* you to see. I’m picturing PA’s playing hide-and-seek with idols to insure that Russell found them and no one else did.
RWD- I get your point, but keep in mind that the reason that there are multiple idols to find is that Russell is PLAYING them. So many idol-finders have been voted out holding onto them that they were never put back into play. Maybe b/c said idol-finders were too confident, or maybe b/c they were just stupid. You admitted that you haven’t been watching the show, so you are coming from a different perspective than I am. I understand producer manipulation, but I have watched every episode of every season and I appreciate a good game player.